Human nature is a system made up of complex components, and when thought deeply about, one may begin to wonder just why we are so. We often tend to do what everyone else does, rather than what we are told to do. This natural clumsiness in our behavioral propensity frequently leads to our emotional instability.
When it comes to creating well-being in ourselves, it is important to understand the concept of building one's perspective unbiased by other people's actions.
As the days roll in and out, it is either you are just coming from a lot, going through a lot, or are going to go through a lot. It is the cycle of life and has now become the norm in these times when every piece of information can overwhelm one. Heck, the debit alerts still make my heart race.
At the same time, we want for a different kind of life, one filled with meaning and happiness. But it seems impossible to live such a life; to always be in this "happy zone."
Think positively, they say.
Everybody says to think positively, and then happiness will just magically flow out. We all know it's not helpful to worry about things, but we still find ourselves doing just that. This is because our minds often wander. One moment you are concentrating on how much you need to save to get your dream car, and boom, the thought of your term paper that's due next week comes up.
This is quite normal as our brains tend to wander for about 45% of the times we are awake. This is why it is never easy, if not impossible, to focus on, say, one's heartbeat for five minutes without thinking about any thing else. But lifting up your mobile phone would be much easier to do for five minutes.
The prevailing negative thoughts
It would be an overwhelming notion to process if we thought about every single detail of our lives and the events that surround us. Instead, our minds have formed this cognitive bias that assists us in categorizing, prioritizing, and sorting information, making it easier to think. It affects how we perceive life and situations.
What we now have is a negative bias that helps call attention to uncomfortable or potentially dangerous situations. It is especially useful in "fight or flight" circumstances where our high alertness is crucial. In other cases, though, this negative bias confines our minds to focusing on the unpleasant aspects of our existence. Our brains are concerned that we survive, and not that we are happy survivors.
Happiness is a skill
Many individuals recognize the importance of physical activity and its benefits to one's well-being and health. However, it is unusual for us to consider psychological activities.
Happiness does not come from fame, fortune, or hard labor. It comes from relationships. It is determined by quality rather than quantity. What matters is our ability to be vulnerable, listen, and express what is close to our hearts.
Have you ever shared with a person how important they are to you and how much you care about them? If you have, you will agree that, in a way, it makes one feel good (happy).
Making other people happy has a boomerang effect on us. If one could do something like this regularly (making other people smile), one would realise that they would regularly be happy. It really could be anyone. Try it. Making people smile has a boomerang effect of making us happy.
Our minds have the tendency to highlight the negatives in our lives. And it is really tricky to revoke that just by positive thinking. One needs to compensate with positive action.
However, some actions are more positive and yield better results; they involve investing your time and effort in your environment and in relationships that you keep.
This is a matter of concern when depression seems to hit hard. It is not all about you all the time. If one can be good to people around them often and deliberately, happiness tends to ooze from within somehow.
Sing that song, How Are You [My Friend] to a friend. Or you could just share that kind of song with some kind of appreciation message. You'd sure feel the happiness.
TL;DR
Be more understanding and caring, and people may just emulate you and return the happiness. Remember how we tend to do what other people do? Just imagine a world where everyone tries to be good.
ℍ𝕖𝕪, 𝕚𝕗 𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕖𝕟𝕛𝕠𝕪𝕖𝕕 𝕥𝕙𝕚𝕤 𝕡𝕠𝕤𝕥, 𝕜𝕚𝕟𝕕𝕝𝕪 𝕝𝕖𝕒𝕧𝕖 𝕒 𝕔𝕠𝕞𝕞𝕖𝕟𝕥, 𝕣𝕖𝕓𝕝𝕠𝕘, 𝕠𝕣 𝕦𝕡𝕧𝕠𝕥𝕖. 𝕀𝕥'𝕝𝕝 𝕤𝕦𝕣𝕖 𝕓𝕖 𝕒𝕡𝕡𝕣𝕖𝕔𝕚𝕒𝕥𝕖𝕕.