I am back to Cumaná after four long and exhausting days at my home town. My mother is struggling to recover from her femur fracture. As I told in previous posts, we had to decide to take her home after a horrible experience at the hospital. She is definitely not having surgery at a public hospital and we can’t afford a private clinic. We’ve been forced to just to take care of her at home with all the limitations we have and the risks and complications of a bed bound person her age.

Heat and constant blackouts, especially at night do not make her recovery any easier. Except for intermittent 5 minute-lapses at night, I have not slept since Monday.

That’s nothing compared to what my sister has to do. Besides helping at night every time we have to rotate my mother’s position sit her up, or change her, she is also in charge of most house chores (especially cooking and doing the laundry). I help as much as I can, but she still has a lot of additional work to do. We are paying a neighbor to help (they are all people in need and although they may provide occasional volunteer help, they need the money and we really need their help for as long as possible during the day) and she too is doing a great job, especially dealing with my mother’s constant calls for minute things like asking her to rub her back, remove, or add pillows.

A few days ago, the first ulcers started to appear in her lower back, despite the special mattress and skin care. Her own body weight and the heat works against her. A quick response with the help of a neighbor who is a retired nurse prevented the ulcers from getting worse. She told us what to buy, I got it as soon as I could and my mother’s skin looks better now. The nurse did a great job. My mother’s leg is still swollen and she still has lots of pain every time we do the rotations or she needs to go through her hygiene routine, but she can sit now and that helps a lot.

I guess the healer also did a good job. My mother trusts that kind of (super?)natural medicine and that has helped her mentally. It also helps that some of her neighbors have been in similar and even worse situations. Their stories of recoveries are inspiring and I know she can benefit from that.

Elders enjoy having company, someone to talk to. They want to feel they are loved and respected. They dread being alone. Taking care of an elder person is a tremendously demanding job. Psychologically it can be exhausting and the care giver is supposed to be in the best shape possible so that they can infuse optimism and affection to the patient to speed up their recovery.

I spend a good part of the day running errands to provide them with anything they need at home, while at the same time working on the computer to continue generating an income that can guarantee that the most basic needs are covered. Most of my mother’s relatives are in similar precarious situations and there is little they can contribute in terms of economic support, but they try to support in other ways and that is also appreciated.

Doing a good job may be a relative concept depending on who does the assessment. I want to think we are doing a good job taking care of my mother and taking care of a house that saw better days and has now lots of lacks, especially to deal with a bed bound relative.

Nights are long and tiresome, but every sun rise tells us, just keep going. Do your best and things will work out.

Thanks for your reading

This was my entry to @mariannewest and @latino.romano’s 5 Minute Freewrite: Tuesday Prompt: GOOD JOB. You can see the details here.

Make sure you visit the Freewrite House!!!