I went from kickin rocks & smokin boulders,
Over encumbered from the weight on my shoulders,
To being sober and movin past the strife,
Bringing myself back to life,
I was in the depths of hell,
Demons had me livin not so well,
How it happened it was kinda strange,
But I found the path that led to change,
The Devil pulls but God showed the light,
Gave me the courage to finally fight,
I remember feeling I had no one else,
I was so close to killing myself,
Then one night I heard his voice,
Joshua my Son you have a choice,
There that night I was on my knees,
I was calling out God please,
He asked me can I really do this,
He'll walk beside me all the way thru this,
Tears down my cheeks tasting my pain,
I cursed in vein screaming his name,
Dont you tease me show me the way,
I dont even know how to fuckin pray,
I want your love your confidence,
Send me someone to give me guidance,
Breathe the life back in my lungs,
Take the pain from when I was young,
Forgive the wrongs I've done before,
I dont wanna live this way no more,
The crime the drugs are no longer fun,
Show me how to love my Son,
Give me more time with my Dad & Mother,
I want my sisters & brothers to love each other,
I want peoples love & trust,
I'm dying lord this is a must,
Just when I thought he'd refuse,
He started handing me the tools,
My eyes were shut & heart was open,
It no longer felt like it was broken,
Life no longer felt like it was over,
Cause I realized he Gave Me Sober!
So this is about a personal time in my life... I use to be a different kind of person and it was around the time I wrote this poem back in 2019 that I chose to live life a better way. I had a life changing experience that maybe I will share somehow in the future... But I would love to share anything that might inspire someone else or maybe help them through a tough time because sometimes thats all it takes is reading something or seeing something, another persons experience that makes it click inside of your head like shit, " I will be ok " or " I am not alone " or whatever it is that sparks that life changing mentality one may get...
Ive lived a life far from perfect and this is an omission of sort i guess but now you have had a chance to learn something about me, hope that you appreciate that and thanks for reading!!!
***Credits for Image it to that of myself, shot from about the 21st floor of the Intercontinental Hotel Downtown St Paul sometime around July 2020. This is the mighty Mississippi River in the shot