Gloomy Days in Bantayan Island

Hello everyone!

I watched this travel vlog on YouTube and I realized why I can't be a travel vlogger. First, you have to be interesting as a person. And I think I'm the least interesting person in the world. Second, you have to have a lot of stored energy and positivity. Guess what, I'm lethargic most of the day and I'm pragmatic at best. I'm surely pessimistic. Third, you have to be the best at what you do. I am the most average and mediocre in this space. It's a fatal combo for a content creator, but it's my reality. Last, you have to be authentic or else, your audience won't resonate with you. I might have a hint of authenticity, but I still worry about what other people think about me. In short, I'm still so awkward in a social setting, including here or in any social media.

Before this post turns into a trauma dump, let's talk about the travel itself.

This vacation in Bantayan Island has long been planned in the group since Queenie is coming home from New Zealand for her yearly vacation. I was optimistic at first, but due to my sister's hospitalization, I decided that I won't go with my friends because the planned date coincided with my sister's follow-up checkup. I already conditioned myself that I won't be having any travels in the near term as my sister's medications became the first priority. I also got sick together with the whole family, so I was already dejected.

When @glecerioberto organized a dinner for Queenie together with his despidida as he's already set to have his PhD in Singapore, I was convinced by Queenie to join this trip. I was reluctant at first because of my sister's checkup, but the checkup was moved to December 23 instead of December 20. Queenie insisted that she will shoulder all my expenses for this trip. I was again having second thoughts because I was still sick. I didn't have a fever anymore, but my cough was still persistent. It was my sister who convinced me to join this vacation.

For those countries with four seasons, they have winter, but for us in the tropics, it's just sunny or rainy seasons. In the Philippines, it's even always sunny for the most part of the year except when there's a typhoon. On the night before the trip, it rained so hard and there was a low pressure area. I didn't prepare anything because I thought the trip won't be pushed through. I forgot that this group of friends can't be stopped. Rain or shine, Queenie was still optimistic.

For the two days that we were in the island, it was raining or the sky was all gloomy. I thought I would spiral into depression, but surprisingly, I embraced the gloomy weather. I loved it! I felt I needed that weather to rest. As the waves were bigger, the island hopping itinerary was cancelled. We still went to Sandira Beach and Balidbid Lagoon, but that's it. I didn't have any photos of these beaches because I was sleeping somewhere most of the time. Good thing my friends just allowed me to be the most depressing member of the group.

These photos were the only photos I have in this trip. I was even fighting the urge of not taking any photos. Queenie said it's just for clout-chasing so I must take at least a few photos. These were taken when we were strolling along Kota Beach to find something to eat.

I felt like this trip captured my current state. The sea was rough, the beach was littered by sargassum brought by the waves, and the sky was covered by think clouds. But I embraced all of it. "Hang in there, things will get better" or "There's always light at the end of the tunnel", these are the things I always hear from friends. I really appreciate them for being optimistic for me, but I'm not sure if I can say the same.

Strolling along Kota Beach made me realize that I have to go through all these things for reasons I can't still fathom. I didn't even bother asking why. I just conditioned myself to accept whatever comes my way without trying to rationalize everything. I'm also trying make myself accept that there might be no answer to all the questions I have. I don't want to even bother asking questions anymore.

For now I just want to rest because I don't know what comes next. I no longer have the drive to look forward into the future with enthusiasm. Sorry to those who are rooting for me. I don't have that fervor anymore.

Back to the trip, I'm just thankful that my friends allowed me to sleep as much as I can. I didn't even join as much when they were playing cards. I realized how exhausted I was when I slept at a hammock in Balidbid Lagoon while they were preparing for lunch.

I noticed in this trip that Bantayan is no longer the same as it was four years ago. A lot of businesses are popping up and ongoing constructions of hotels or resorts are evident in the island. With the opening of a local airport in the island, for sure there will be a boost in tourism. It usually takes four hours of travel from the city to Hagnaya Port and then two hours of ferry to the island, but with the direct flight from Mactan-Cebu International Airport to Bantayan Airport, you're already in the island in just 30 minutes.

I guess that's all for this post. If your interested about Bantayan, here are my previous posts about the island:

Kim Ybañez

_{Welcome to Kim's small corner in Hive. He is a chemical engineer by profession but a blogger by passion. He is a wanderlust and an adventure seeker. Join his quests as he visits remote destinations, climbs mountains, tries new and exotic dishes, and explores his country (The Philippines). He's also a trying-hard photographer, so stay tuned as he shares his photos and his thought process while creating them.}

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