I'm currently sitting at the corridors of my penthouse well above the 5th floor of the old Zik building, a building that has lasted since the 80's and really looks 80, I know it doesn't cure me by observing the city and it's environs while I meditate and reminisce on the events of the day or the week as it occurs to me.
After looking up for a while, say about an hour or two, I thought aloud " but I need foresight not hindsight". I bowed my head for another thirty minutes while I wondered how I could get it all right. Maybe just coming up here gives me that feeling of being in control or being closer to my Creator. I don't know but somehow I feel I'm above the normal human realm. It's becoming an addiction maybe, but I don't want this moment to end. In this time i feel all my mood and senses function at its peak. I know it doesn't cure me but I don't want this moment to end.
"I need to get it all fixed", I said again thinking aloud to myself.
I won't say I don't know how I got to this point, it's all me. I have been the problem all this while, that's if what I have should actually be called a problem Or maybe it's the NOW part.
Trying to fix it all now. I think that's the biggest part of our problems as humans.
We often have certain experiences that remind us of what it means to be human. Such great lessons we often miss when we encounter periods of lows in our lives.
Those moments when we're at our weakest point. When it seems as if everything is not working with us and not working for us, and it seems as if life is pushing us to the wall. And we think we're badly in need of fresh air, maybe a total break from this whole chaos.
And someone will ask if being human equals imperfection ? Maybe that's why I'm asking for foresight, because I think if I know what's ahead, I would surely take caution.
Well the answer is not far fetched as you know, and it's not an easy say if you think about it. For nature itself is not perfect in a wholesome definition. But what does it care about being perfect or imperfect. It just goes around being nature. Have you ever thought of a life where you knew what tomorrow was going to be like, you know what the next month or the next year was going to be like ?? Alot of us wouldn't want to live to see it. Alot of us would run away from it. While some will jump into it already. Maybe it doesn't even surprise you how you cross those bridges when the times come.
I'm still here, not thinking aloud to myself this time. Maybe finally I have a bit of relief. Yeah I hope it's temporal, after all it doesn't cure me. Because I don't know what's coming next. But for this recurring parts of my life, I can attempt hazarding a guess.
I have seen times come and go, seasons don't remain. I feel cold now and I'll surely feel the heat at another time. This life doesn't end.
Seriously I don't want to get to that point where I've got it all figured out. I want to keep being a student to life.
I want to encounter new challenges. I want to challenge the things I've always known, I want to be able to learn, unlearn, relearn and improve. Life will always be like a wave. And I hope we learn to live with the highs and lows. That's what makes us thrive, What makes life worth living.
Enjoy those moments of highs, be proud of the success and breakthroughs, never expect the worst from life. But catch the lessons when it's all low. Wake up everyday with the desire to live, participate and to always represent. You can either run from the rain or run in the rain. Just know that the rain won't last. Do whatever you want with the moment you have.
Thank you for reading through. I'm Stevewealth 😁 sending you lots of love from my penthouse ❤️
all pictures are mine, taken from the rooftop, at the corridor of my penthouse.