I'm quite disappointed to report that I've just finished a rather bad Matt Damon movie. A long time ago there was a somewhat famous radio-show icon that said "I think that every Leonardo DiCaprio film would be just a little bit better if they were Matt Damon movies" and I agree with that statement. I think that Damon has a magnificent range and pulls off almost any genre.... ALMOST. After watching this movie I think that perhaps Damon should forever stay away from Comedies because well, it just doesn't really work for him.
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I tend to appreciate Casey Affleck as well even though if it weren't for his brother Ben, we probably never would have heard of his ass.
The plot of this movie seems innocent enough and from a setup point of view it seems like it could be a good premise for a film. Two strangers, one a recently divorced Marine (Damon) and the other an alcoholic ex-con (Affleck) accidentally team up for a heist that they meticulously plan but everything falls apart right as soon as it gets going.
The idea here is that the Marine, whose name in the film is Rory, excels at a lot of things because of his time in the Marines is going to be a fantastic addition to a team pulling off theft. However, he doesn't have the criminal's aspect and you can tell that he doesn't have an easy time being mean to people. "Cobby" on the other hand is the polar opposite of Rory in that he is willing to do whatever it takes to get the job done but lacks the skills to do so. They got this sort of Yin/Yang thing going on and I suppose if the dialogue was better, or if either of these guys were good at delivering punchlines, it could have been funny.
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Anything that can go wrong during this heist simply seems to do exactly that and this was humorous the first 11 times it happened but then it became so common that you were expecting it and therefore, it is no longer funny. There were also a bunch of cameos that Matt and the Afflecks probably called in favors for, but even this couldn't turn this really boring film around.
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Ron Perlman, Alfred Molina (Dr. Octopus from Spiderman), as well as a few other names briefly take part in this debacle of a film but Ving Rhames is probably the cameo that I disliked the most. He plays the role of a Officer Frank, a special ops police officer that seems to be completely above the law and just does whatever he wants with impunity. As nuts as such a position sounds there is another problem with him being in this role especially when his big reveal happens complete with suspenseful music even though you could tell simply by the size of his fat head when he is walking, that it is Ving Rhames that we are about to see. Here's the thing: Ving is now 65 years old and he hasn't been keeping up with the gym and therefore, to me and many others, he simply isn't an imposing figure anymore. Here's the thing, Ving NEVER WAS very big as he is only 6 feet tall and under 200 lbs. He was used in certain camera angles in the past to make him appear more imposing but I started noticing exactly how average size he is in the last couple of Mission Impossible films. He just isn't scary and there are a ton of other people they could have gotten for this role that would have been more convincing.
I suppose we have to consider that Matt Damon in only 5 foot 10 and Casey clocks in a mere 5 foot 8 and I was surprised to learn that.
That aside, this movie is quite simply, very boring.
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Even when things are exploding and there is a car chase going on complete with gunfire I was just like "alright, just get on with it already."
The car chase scenarios are especially stupid because these two end up in vehicles like a 1998 Toyota Corolla and outrun the police. Sure.
Unrealistic escapes aside, the chemistry between Affleck and Damon simply isn't there, nor is there the sort of sense of urgency that one would expect to view in a movie where a major heist gets flubbed and two people who have their pictures all over the television are just casually hanging out in a house taking a nap rather than running for their lives.
It's meant to be a couple of knuckleheads that accidentally get away with it and well, that is exactly what happens. I really don't consider this to be a spoiler because it is evident in the trailer and it is clear that this is exactly what is going to happen after the fourth or fifth time that the two of them just happen to get away due to no expertise on their own part. It's a stupid!
Should I watch it?
This is going to be one of the most emphatic "NO"s that I have given in a while and even though this isn't the worst thing you could see the expectations are set so high by the ensemble cast that you kind of expect it to at least be decent but it simply isn't. Movies with big stars and a lot of hype behind them that are complete duds are much more upsetting to me than films with no budget that none of us had any real expectations out of in the first place that end up predictably bad. This film honestly has no redeeming qualities and I would say that if you spend your 90 minutes doing literally anything else, it will be time better spent.
Ben Affleck and Matt Damon were both producers on this and I can't help but feel as though the two of them simply wanted to return to their Boston-speak roots and this is why this one was made.
If you insist on subjecting yourself to this garbage it can be legally streamed on AppleTV+ or rented from a number of other places. I once again strongly recommend that you do not do so