Today, I started back to classes for the spring semester. I did so after having my life turned absolutely upside down this past week. I also just did seven hours of coursework while caring for an ill family member, coordinating some care for another ill family member, organizing some much needed resources for a very dear, incredibly ill friend, and oh yes, I am also ill, with some sort of virus.
It's been a trying day.
But, all of my training that I have been working so hard on over the last few years kicked in. When I wanted to just dissolve into a pile of poor me goo, I didn't. I just time blocked what I needed to do, assessed what I could control, and got to work.
Now, I am not going to say the day was pleasant, but I did get it all done, and I did learn some amazing things in the process, both in the realm of my education path and about myself.
One, I am not afraid to ask for help anymore. In fact, I am getting good at it. A couple of my classes went hard right out of the gate with group meetings requirements, and usually I would jump right in and start organizing. In one class, this amazing classmate of mine took initiative, and when she reached out to me, I let her know a little of what I was currently navigating, that I would be a very devoted participant, and just how much I appreciated her taking the lead on coordinating everybody, because quite honestly, I just don't have it in me today.
She was absolutely amazing, she even offered to help me in any class we shared together this semester. I felt blessed. And humbled.
The second area is I am really embracing the progress not perfection mindset. I block out what I desire to get done, triaged in a manner of most important task to lesser so, and don't beat myself up if I have to delay things or not accomplish them in a superhuman manner. I am learning, and have learned, to take care of myself.
There were quite a few times today, when my eyes were blurred with sinus pain or when my thyroid gland was all sorts of swollen due to viral attackage that I just wanted to go crawl back into bed. But I didn't, I kept going.
And even though it wasn't the way I wanted to start this semester, as I learned to navigate the most amazing human biology software we are using this spring, I realized that I still was beyond elated to just be here, alive, and learning. Yes, my current situation is more than a bit overwhelming, yes, I feel like absolute crap, but I live in a time where I can explore the plasma membrane of a cell and its lipid layer and protein passing structures in 3D detail at the tips of my fingers in full 1080HD! We live in the most amazing time, and I am not going to let a little adversity wreck my enthusiasm or attitude regarding that fact.
And now, now I am going to go get a cup of tea and take a much needed nap and break.