I find it quite difficult to share my struggles with others. But I can share my own struggles with myself, I will try to consider this writing as something I write for myself. If anyone finds it valuable, it's a bonus. I don't have any expectations so I can relax and write the way I wanted to write.
I have been journaling for the last 4 weeks in a row and never missed a single day, Therefore I feel confident I can now continue to write one hive blog a day assuming it's my own diary.
Last month I celebrated being debt-free for the second time in my life. My money problem got worsen in August 2019 and I wanted to fix it because it was spreading like cancer into all other areas of my life. So I took a break from steem, decided to move back to London from Japan to get myself out of this situation knowing I only have myself to blame to get into this situation in the first place.
I like to think that if I lost all my money and you dropped me on a random street in any country, I'd earn my wealth again within 5-10 years.
This was a quote from Naval Ravikant, which kept reminding me over and over again and slowly took baby steps towards financial recovery.
Looking back now, I did bounce back fairly quickly and got myself a job with reasonable pay. More importantly, I was on the track of paying my debt back, building my confidence back, and rebuilding the trust back from my partner.
Then covid came, lockdown came and I lost the job but I didn't panic and stayed calm but not for too long. I had to completely figure out a new way to paying back my debt while figuring out a new way to be with my wife and son. I had to make some risky choices and had faith that everything will be okay.
May 2020 to May 2021 was one of the most challenging 12 months for me. I faced problems after problems, lots of uncertainty about the direction my life was heading. I was almost ready to file personal bankruptcy and we almost got divorced.
When in doubt, just take the next small step.
I just keep taking the next small steps. Then May 2021 came and we decided to get a divorce. I paused my life for 2 weeks and trying to figure out what was the number one problem that causing the divorce. It was clear to me there can be only two one is money and the other is we're not a good fit. So I made a strong decision to work on my relationship while prioritizing paying the debt off fully.
Weeks went by, I still haven't figure out how I'm going to pay it back and However, I kept telling myself that by end of September I will be debt-free.
I had only one desire for the past 3 months and that is being debt-free and its journey that I could write an entire book about how I did it.
Pick your one overwhelming desire. It’s okay to suffer over that one. But on all the other desires, let them go so you can be calm and peaceful and relaxed.