Looking back at my past, I am always grateful for everything I have lived through, for what my mothers did for me, for my grandparents who were always my most important staff. Without all that I would not be the person I am today, brave, prepared, mature, with a noble heart, humble and respectful towards the people around me.
I am the eldest daughter, I have a sister 3 years younger than me. My parents never lived together so I don't have many memories with him.
My mother, a nurse's aide, with a confused and immature mind, always made mistakes that led me as a minor to face consequences that I did not want because obviously I, a child, was not able to say or choose how I wanted things to be with my father. So I always denied the visit, the outings, even the things he wanted to bring. Today I say that it was anger and immaturity that I did not know how to deal with the separation and that is why I marked that distance to that bond of father and daughter that I had to live.
But that is how the years went by and when I started to have use of reason things were still the same, distance with my father, he rebuilt his life and also raised his wife's son from a very young age. I had more communication and coexistence with my paternal grandparents with whom I shared a little more and enjoyed wonderful moments on vacations, especially when I went to spend a few days with them. Sometimes my father would also go with his wife and son. Today I have a cordial and respectful relationship with them, without reproaches or grudges. (What happened, happened).
My mother started a relationship with my sister's father and since I was a year and a half old, he is the one who raised me and my sister, he always says I have two daughters regardless of the fact that I don't carry his blood.
Evidently he is the one who has been much more present than my biological father in many of my past moments, such as my birthday, my school promotions, graduations, frustrations and achievements.
But as not everything is perfect I have to say the hardest part they also separated and it was very difficult for two girls who were also not to blame for what their parents did. All because their bad character, their bad verbal treatment were so many that my mom could not stand that we saw that and this time she divorced them, but legally, with division of assets and everything.
This time she did not make the same mistake in separating us from my dad, nor did she prohibit us from visiting him and enjoying him. On the contrary, they now get along very well as friends.
Today I am 31 years old and after telling you something that has marked my life and my way of thinking about personal and love relationships, I would like to give you some advice.
- Life is fair for each person.
- The time is perfect and everything arrives and settles in equity and harmony as long as your mind is clear and mature to make decisions.
- Do not act under rage, pride and anger.
- Do not say words that offend and hurt others.
- Treat others as you would like to be treated.
- Listen to the person next to you, it is not just hearing. (They are different things).
- Life takes many turns, that from one moment to another it takes you to the place where you should be.
- You don't have to live in an environment of offenses and discomfort for the children to be happy, sometimes separating gives them more tranquility, stability and confidence.
- Talk about the things you don't like.
- Respect so that they respect you and thus you give a good example to your children.
I hope I have contributed something for you and if you are living a similar moment, you can make decisions calmly, serenity and maturity.
We came to this land to leave it much more beautiful, conscious and happy. Much better than we have found it in this long road of life.
This is my entry for week 99 (WE) from its creator @galenkp
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Translated with www.DeepL.com/Translator (free version)
The image edits were made in Canva