When I think of the word, some shiny image of Newton come to my mind, it's maybe the graphic meaning of the word for me. He was brilliant. Many others went and are as well. His, however, is the image that pops up.
Like some others are, brilliant is a huge word, a word I wouldn't use to describe myself. I'd say I'm next to brilliantly espontaneous, handling numbers and finding fast solutions under presure, but, not brilliant. Not at all.
I would like to be brilliant though.
Weekend Engagement Week 263
When one's anywhere, doing anything, matters or not, happy or not, focused or not, and still is able to build in the mind, write in the paper in two completely different languages, a small peace of something that can change people's perception, heart beat rhythm, mood, skin texture, time line and sometimes even problems. When someone can get a piece of paper and something else to design and create a small perfect piece that can bring tears out of eyes, move grounds, give wings to mind, submerge oneself into a beautiful unreal or real reality moment with just a snap of the fingers or neurons, that someone,...yeah, that someone is brilliant and I strongly desire to be that kind of someone.
I consider creation, deep and amazing-that leaves you speechless creation... brilliant and so the creator.
Two different languages
Words and musical notes.
Yes, I would like to be brilliantly music creator, a genius at writing, composing, interpreting and playing creator, that,...that would fullfill me. Not to be famous, not to be followed, not to be the center of attention, but to enjoy, to encourage, to heal, to bring joy, to connect, to engage..., 5o fucken share my guts through out music, to touch your heart and maybe give you a tool to touch someone else's heart, to dig in deep,...yes, I would like to be a brilliant music creator and intepreter, and maybe with this desire I could be reiterative, but those are my inner and deepest feelings and desires transalted into a weekend engagement topic.
...about that...
There is one lesson I learned on the hard way, I, and many others as I've said maybe in some other post, was abused in highschool in some ways and for many reasons, cowardy guess was one of them, fear, allowance, I don't know. I just know I fucken hate abuse and haven't allowed it ever since. At that time, after abusement time, I got some... let's say, wrong criteria, or power,or something stucked inside that made me a dick for a while, ...I don't certainly know either. But I made a mistake to mess with a good boy and friend in front of others, I was probably trying to take it out on all the abuses I had been subjected to, or trying to prove something to myself(wrongly) and was bothering the guy, who, in a defense position, punched me hard in the face just once, because of what I was doing, I didn't fall, but the mark remained a few days in the eye, the lesson remained longer.
Never do to anyone what you don't like to be done to your self. And don't fucken ever be abusive with no fucken body.
And yes, I think I mentioned in some other post as well, I punched one son of a ...mother in the face out of his disrespectful and aggressive behaviour and some accumulated anger towards the guy for several other annoying reasons and previous wrong engagements, as I said then, I'm not proud of doing it, but he deserved it, so he got it.
