While everyone in the delivery room was rejoicing about Derby's safe delivery, she appears to be the only one that is worried. What could she be thinking of at this critical point in her marriage? How can she not look at her baby girl with a smiling face?
Nobody knows the pain that Derby is facing. While the pain of childbirth is already eating her up, thoughts of how she will pay her hospital bills camped her in like a lost soul. "Why did I bring a child into this world?" Derby voiced out loud. "Why on Earth did I fall in love with…” She sighed.
"Does it mean that my bloodline is cursed with the worst possible guys out there as husbands?" She questioned the air that surrounded her. "This ill fate of ours has to end with me. I would be too broken to see this same thing play out in the life of my daughter."
Derby looked at the child in her hand with a teary-filled eye. She had hoped the curse would end with her. For goodness sake! She vowed it would end with her, but she couldn’t keep the promise made.
Not when it was bound to happen.
Still staring at her baby, her mind flashed back to her childhood days toward adulthood. Sadly, she had made the same mistake her great-grandmother made... her grandma, her mother, and now she! The pity she felt for them is what she feels for herself.
During her childhood days, Derby watched her father come home every day drunk and how her mother welcomed him like a puppy who hasn’t seen its owner for a million years. It was pathetic. Every day, her mother lived this pitiful life of doing everything her husband wants. Leaving her out of the picture.
As far as Derby was concerned, she didn’t exist in her parent's world leaving her to care for herself. It was sad because she watched how other parents treat their wards. This prompted her to vow that she will not let fate decide things for her since she knew her family was accursed.
Derby grew up into a teenager with zero enthusiasm toward marriage. She didn’t want to get caught up in the web of her family drama. No! She would not let it happen. How fate made every daughter in her family ill fortune with their choice of men is something she can’t lay her fingers on. However, she couldn’t explain how she got herself tangled in her family's curse. She was careful not to get close to any man. The fact is part of her despised men, especially those accursed to her family.
Drunkards!
How she got tangled in this mess is a misery to her. Was it love, lust, or something dark that pushed her into this? She questioned, shaking her head in the process.
Sighing deeply, she remembered how she met him. Derby worked in a restaurant as a waiter whereas Jason was a regular eater. He never missed a day. He was kind, carefree, and always left tips for anyone that served him. Not to mention that he is outspoken with a killer smile, the kind that can sweep any lady off her feet.
Derby stayed far away from him. She did everything she could to stay off his space but fate wouldn’t let her. When Jason asked for her contact, it was hard to say no. Not with his innocent look. It was hard to believe she gave him her contact but she did anyways and her decision 3 years ago caused her this dilemma.
If only she had… sniffing and holding back her tears, her mind wandered to her past again.
The moment Jason had her contact, they were inseparable! They would talk every day for hours. He was part of her daily activities and so was she. This surged a weird feeling in her heart. It was like a string was tied to her throat... It was choking her. Her mind screamed ” tell him”, but tell him what? That every second without his presence was a misery? That he makes her day better, or what?
Jason came into her life as a friend though she could feel he wants more or was it her imagination? Just when she thinks she might end up crazy with her feelings, Jason asked her a question that got her breathless. It was like she moved through the universe in a flash. His voice still rings in her head, ” will you be my girlfriend?” and all she did was nod like a child who has been promised that the tooth fairy would put a dollar on her pillow for losing her teeth. Their love started and all conviction she had against men was off the roof. It seemed the vow she made never existed.
For 2 years and some months, they courted. When she found out she was pregnant, Jason was happy. He was so happy that her wedding was done at her 28th birthday party. It was a double celebration! Though her married life turned sour some months after their wedding. Jason started drinking or was he a drinker before they courted? She couldn’t answer. She waved off the part that reminded her that her family tree has been cursed. Jason isn’t like that, she kept telling herself whenever he kissed her with his movement reeled. Jason got addicted to alcohol when his business almost went down the drain due to the economic instability of the country.
It was a disaster!
She could remember how she cried every day, begging Jason to stop his drinking but all he gave was a promise. Promises that weren’t fulfilled...how ironic! His drinking affected their marriage and she almost lost herself if not that she knew she is pregnant. Unable to stop the tears that now filled her face, Derby stared at her baby again and again as tears filled her eyes, almost blinding her vision.
Looking at the hospital door, she cleaned her tears with her palms as a new surge of energy seeped into her. Though she wasn’t able to fight off fate, she will make sure her daughter doesn’t grow up with her mistake. She won’t be miserable like her great-grandmother, grandmother, and mother.
Staring at her baby for the umpteenth time, she smiled and spoke, “Welcome to the world my blessing. You are loved and will be an amazing person in the future”.