Hi @dele02.
We often provide feedback to writers who are just getting started. The Ink Well has some great resources in our catalog of fiction writing tips. For example, we have tips on developing characters in your stories, and integrating action, dialog and narrative. These resources can help you learn how to include the important elements of fiction in your stories.
Another great resource in our catalog is an article titled Help for the Grammatically Challenged. It describes how to use Google Docs to draft your content, and it will point out errors and misspellings that should be fixed before posting. For example, it would catch this error for you:
taking shifts whenever she could to sullrt her self
Good luck and keep writing!
RE: Joan