I was 17 years old back then. I had an awesome family, we were always happy being together. We didn't have a luxury life but we had a happy life. My father chose to stay at home instead of working abroad. He was a licensed seaman but stopped when I was born. I was the eldest of the 3 siblings, 2 boys including me and 1 girl.
Life wasn't easy for us. Father was forsaken by his parents when he chooses my mother and stopped working. Father became a fisherman, a farmer, laborer and any types of work that can earn money. While my mother was selling food in the neighbors and sometimes accepted dirty clothes to wash. As the eldest son it became part of my daily life to help them. Before I went to school, I helped my mother preparing the food she was cooking. My father went into the sea at dawn hoping that he can catch fish because it's early. After school I was the one who took care the house chores because I know they were tired.
unsplash by Ayotunde Oguntoyinbo
One evening, we were so worried because the sea seems angry. The wind blows strong it created a small waves which is not normal. Thunder claps from everywhere and father still in the sea. We waited for him at the shed house near at the shore. But not for long of waiting, my father approached us smiling and said.
"Did I make you worried?"
Father kissed the youngest and then my mother. Even in my teenage age I was still worried and I couldn't stop myself to ask him.
"Why you didn't go home right away when the weather started to get mad?"
After saying it I turned back at him. He then gave me the bucket with fishes on it. He looked at me but I looked at the other direction. He knew that I was embarrassed at that moment. I noticed him looking at mother, smiled and leaned his left arm in my shoulder. He pin pointed the light from the lighthouse and said.
"Don't worry son, if I couldn't see that start above. That light of lighthouse in the sea will serves as the star to guide me in going home to you my family."
That words from my father keep on coming back even though how many years has passed. Every time I feel sad, I will just look up in the sky and watch the stars. By doing that, even if I wasn't home I still imagined that we have the same sky and made me think they're still near. Sometimes I reached their faces that were drawn into the sky.
Sad to say that I worked so hard for them but they were now gone. I wanted to fly them in the sky or walk through them into the sea. But it's impossible to happen for now. It was the day before of my graduation far from our home. You will ride a bus and then ship before to reach my school.
My father was really excited when I told him that I was one of the graduating student. He insisted of going into my school when I'll be on stage and to speak because I was the top student so I was obliged to say something. But I told father not to go because the Ambo storm is coming. He just laughed at me and said, "Son, if you have faith in God nothing will happen and to think that there are still ships sailing. It's just mean that the typhoon is not that serious."
I have no words to tell anymore because I knew how my father's felt that moment.
However, faith was so cruel, no matter how happy you are and excited. Sometimes it will be betrayed and stabs your heart. Yeah, it was 5 years now since my whole family abandoned me. It was killing me when I found out that the ship they were riding was sunk in the middle of the sea. My happiness that I forced to hide for that moment that father and mother will see me in the stage was never came true. It was more than a thorn of love that chained my whole body. I was like a blind man that never know where to look to find the reason to live. I was dead for long after that incident.
They were long gone but they're vividly visible into my mind. Nothing can be done because it's already happened. I will just remember the words of my father if I feel like I'm lost.
"Just look at the star and you will know where will you go."
THE END
images are not mind but credited to the rightful owner
d' dreamboy,
@mrnighgtmare89