Rain has always been a game spoiler in Lagos. I'm not talking about the romantic kind of rain that we use as background music in a love story. I'm talking about the Nigerian kind of rain, the one that showed up uninvited, turned roads into rivers, and transformed Oshodi under-bridge into a floating market.
Nobody hated rain like Engineer Opeyemi Dada, his grudge dated back to his NYSC days in Ibadan, when he lost a laptop, two phones, and a meat pie to a three-hour downpour that flooded his hostel.
“Rain is the enemy of progress,” he often declared anytime he sees rain. So by the time he returned to Lagos after his Masters degree in Germany, he had a plan, which is to stop cursing traffic jams caused by floods through knee-deep water while holding your shoes above your head like some refugees in world wars. He envisioned Lagos to enter a new age, an age of weather control when rain can be controlled and repelled.
In an attempt to achieve his vision, Opeyemi made an invention which he called "The Rain Repeller Machine". A device he claimed could redirect rain clouds using localized electromagnetic pulses and positive vibrational energy, powered by solar panels and goat hair extract 😂. It looked like a satellite dish glued to a standing fan, the machine looked very funny because we were wondering what goat hair was doing on a machine but Akinwale confidently said was cutting-edge science.
“This is not juju. This is physics!” he yelled during a TEDx Yaba audition.
No matter how much people laughed at the look of the machine still, Engineer Opeyemi was never discouraged. He applied for a ₦100 million grant from the Federal Ministry of Climate Technology and was miraculously approved. This became a turning point for Engineer Opeyemi's invention.
Before we could say Jack, Opeyemi had an office in Lekki Phase 1 with banners that says "Conquering Weather”.
He hired twelve interns, a PR consultant from Instagram, and a logistics officer who previously sold second-hand tyres at Ladipo😂. Their job was to install the Rain Repellers he had made on streetlights across Victoria Island and Ikeja GRA in Lagos.
The first test came during a July wedding in Surulere, it was the minister’s daughter who was getting married during the rainy season and they wanted an open air wedding, as you all know this is a high-profile owanbe with jollof in different delicacies, small chops, other different continental and inter continental dishes, they even invited two full Fuji bands, it was really the event of the season that's why Opeyemi Dada was employed for his service incase rain decides to show it head. The moment clouds started gathering, Opeyemi activated the device remotely from his phone and the machine started grinning like an abandoned engine.
For the first two minutes it worked, the clouds parted and the sun shined through.
The MC announced, “Please clap for the man who has arrested rain in Nigeria!”, everyone was happy and the party continued. However, few minutes later, the machine overheated and exploded not once, not twice but in six different locations 🥲.
The clouds returned like a vengeance scene in a nollywood film and poured itself out. It rained like never before and everywhere was flooded, the canopy flew away, the amala got soaked. One of the important dignitaries slipped and fell inside the cooler of egusi. Omooo, it was really a disaster that day, the wedding of the season became a nightmare, it was so bad 🥹.
The minister and his family were so furious at Engineer Opeyemi. People came up online and everywhere to start calling Opeyemi's invention “Rain Attractor”.
However , Opeyemi remained undeterred. He said “It’s only a beginner's version. We’re working on the advanced version” while explaining to the TVC news reporters.
He became the laughingstock of Lagos Twitter, people used the story to make different funny memes on social media, his loyal staff started resigning, his investors pulled out, the state government sent auditors to audit his firm.
However, in his dilemma, he still had one person who still believed in his vision , her name is Mama Bisola the woman who sold ewa agoyin (native cooked beans) on his street.
“I no understand all your big big grammar,” she said one morning, handing him a spoonful of her ewa agoyin, “but if you can stop this rain from spoiling my beans, I go carry your matter go church.”
Something about that made him pause. He started having a rethink that maybe instead of stopping the rain, he could build better drainage systems or canopies for street vendors and that can maybe help people adapt instead of trying to fight nature.
Some months later, when the news came that Engineer Opeyemi Dada had launched a new startup called DryMarket which focused on affordable, portable, flood-resistant stalls for traders across Lagos. It was a very great idea in people's ears and everyone supported the idea including the government till it became a reality.
Thank you for staying with me this far, I hope you had a good read, see you next time 🤗