As I repeatedly reminded her, money does not provide you with light. If it was possible we would have bought sun! But can we buy the sun?
We were standing in a small valley. Rita was with me. Then suddenly, the sun came out in that valley, as if someone was trying to see us by lighting a torch in the sky. But the weather turned foggy once again.
It was now becoming difficult to bear that scorching wind in the open valley. Rita’s loose hair was flying in the air. Small waves of light, warmth, and fragrance from her reached me and then disappeared into the cold air. Fog was falling all around us. It was time we returned, as we had to pass through the forest. After all, how long can one stay in the open valley? Something similar was said by Rita earlier too, which was there in my subconscious.
At that moment, the smell of dew soaked wet grass emanating from the atmosphere was mesmerizing me. The nearness of Rita was another factor that was disturbing me, as I was not sure what was attracting me more, the smell of dried autumn leaves or the fragrance coming from Rita's lovely body.
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Temptation, temptation, and more temptation, as I thought some of that smell coming from her body was mine, but I stopped there. Both of us had returned home exhausted after walking all day in the Koyo valley. I guess, Rita understood it, so she had no hesitation in her voice.
She said, "I think, standing here on a cliff with you for so long must have some meaning."
"I don’t understand."
She laughed aloud, "That’s what I can’t promise you."
"I didn’t ask for any promises!" I stared at her in amazement.
"No, you didn’t ask, but your mind is ready to ask..." She was still laughing, "So it is better that I warn you in advance so that you do not feel bad."
I was not surprised because Rita always mystified these things. She once said, "I read somewhere that marriage is the end of romance in which one of the main characters dies in the very first chapter."
I didn’t get what was going on in her mind, and besides, I didn’t have any desire to know about such things. We could always spend our time as friends.
"One thing I didn’t tell you," Rita said and caught me unawares.
"What?
"More than loving each other, the sentiments are more important. If we need to go further in such a relationship, both of us might agree on certain common things."
"Or to hate certain things and situations alike!" I had changed the topic of the conversation.
"It’s not your idea!"
"How much do you know about me?"
"I don’t have to know you much anymore." She laughed again.
It was so accidental that we could not believe that we would meet like this without even ever remembering each other for such a long time. Reeta had taken me to her room for tea. The cold winter wind was blowing outside. The hills were visible from the window but behind a curtain of fog. She looked stunningly beautiful in her white outfit.
"How strange is this?"
"What?"
"Meeting like this after such a long time," Rita asked while making tea.
"Yes!" I was looking at a poster on the wall. It was a satirical poster. A herd of sheep was going together with their heads bowed!
Rita gave me tea.
"What is this funny poster?"
"Is it funny? This is a comment on a workers’ strike that failed. All the sheep are returning with their heads bowed."
I smiled. "That means everything is back to normal."
Rita lifted her eyes, took a sip of tea, and said, "This is not so for me. This is not good for us."
"Why?"
"See, we make medicines and give them to the entire world, but we do not have medicine for our own diseases."
There is a minor crisis in Ukraine nowadays, so workers no longer come from outside. They are killing people instead of making medicine. Is it good?"
I don't care if it's good or bad, but I oppose killings because they affect our economy; otherwise, we ourselves deal in arms for murder and profit. "
"You look furious," Rita said.
"Let’s go for a walk". She proposed, putting the cup of tea on the table.
And we came to this beautiful little valley, passing by the banks of Lama, passing over a carpet of falling yellow and red leaves from poplar trees. The plateau was not flat, but high and low. Slowly, we came down to the valley. I was holding Rita’s hand.
Rita asked, "What does your mind say now?"
I couldn’t understand the context, so I replied, "I’ll think about it in the morning."
"Don’t overstress your mind and soul."
"Have these people left someone’s soul? Where is the soul?"
Rita fell silent again, and we came back, walking almost silently the whole way. It was sunset time.
The fog was getting thicker outside. And the hills were no more visible. The darkness makes even the biggest things look small.
On the table, there was wine in a green-colored bottle. Rita gave me a cup of wine.
"It will do you some good, isn’t it?" Rita probably caught my mind.
Rita put out the candles, and I tried to look through the glass windows.
"When do you have to leave?"
"I have to report tomorrow morning," I answered.
"Oh Christ, it’s okay then." The screeching sounds of the sirens had now gone away.
Rita had lit all three candles again.
"Someone has to report to HQ. They’re out to catch him."
"Tomorrow I have to report for Compulsory Military Training if I don’t..." These sirens will come here too. Speaking of souls, first I will be tried, then punished. I’ll see... I will know by tomorrow morning whether I have any soul left in me."
Rita was very sad now. She came and sat down.
I could feel the thoughts rising in Rita’s mind. Although we didn’t have a very deep desire or aspiration for such things, we could do these things as friends.
One thing isn’t it clear?
"What?"
"That these things are not so important if we both don’t want them!"
"Or to hate certain things and situations alike! I had changed the conversation."
"It’s not your idea!"
"How much do you know about me?"
You don’t have to know one to understand him.
The cold winter wind was blowing outside. The hills were not visible from the window, totally covered with fog.
Am I alone? No, I am not alone; my loneliness is always with me when I sleep; I sleep with my loneliness and wake up with my loneliness.
She looked at me with love and caressed my hair. She kept stroking my cheeks, neck, and messy hair.
The candles were almost lit. I looked at the clay cup, then she said, "Now some people are starting to recognize soul but most people still know nothing about their body, soul, and heart."
I know you! Rita said it softly, I stroked Rita’s hair and placed my lips very close to hers.
Then a candle was extinguished after giving a shivering flame. Now get up! She said, and she went to her room, saying nothing. I also got up and went to my room.
A strong, chilly wind was hitting the glass wall in the room. Was I alone? I'm always alone with my loneliness.
I woke up as she was knocking on the door. The wind had gone, but there was a thick fog outside. Reeta poured tea into the cups.
Rita took a sip of tea and asked, "What is your program?" She asked.
I wanted to hug her, but I got up quietly and went out. I wanted to hide my rising temptation.