"I'm going to have to let you go John." Nothing else entered, just that statement, kept on replaying in my mind. I just couldn't comprehend it.
"Are you with me? John?" I snapped back to reality and saw my boss looking at me expectantly.
"Sir?" I asked, hoping I may have misheard him.
"You're fired, John." He said it again.
I just couldn't control myself, I could feel the tears about to spill. After a few breaths, I managed to keep them at bay.
"If I may ask Sir, why am I being fired?"
He tensed up, like he was expecting the question but didn't know how to go about it.
He stood up and walked towards the window. "What's the name of this company John?"
"Joyful Business Enterprises, sir" I answered simply.
" And what do we do at Joyful Business Enterprises?" He asked again.
" Sir, I don't see how this relates to my quest-"
"Just answer, John." He interrupted me.
"We help producers, sell their products sir." I asked, still confused about where this was going.
"So what do you need to sell a product, John?" He asked
"You'll need prior knowledge of the product, Sir. You'll need to know it's uses, what it's made of, and other impo-"
"What you need, John!!." He interrupted, elongating the need. "...Is that fire."
"Fire, Sir?" I asked.
"You lack it John. Indeed, you're hardworking, punctual, respectful and all that, yet you haven't made more than 3 sales this month. Do you know why that is?"
"It's because you lack the fire." He continued without allowing me to answer his previous question.
"You lack the passion about the product you're about to sell, in other words you're boring both the buyer and you the seller."
He sat back down and looked at me with a straight face, and a set jaw.
"Since you lack the fire, I'll have to let you go. That'll be all John, you may leave."
That experience 3 years ago was still fresh I'm my mind. I've been fired from a lot of jobs after that. Yet, no one has given me a more detailed reason for firing me apart from that.
Although the reason was detailed, I was still confused about what to do. How does one get a fire, to avoid job loss. How does one avoid this string of unemployment?
Walking down the road from another Job interview. I looked at the advertisement block in the newspaper. The business location was close, yet the weather wasn't looking friendly. I was contemplating going home, but I remembered there was no food at home.
"Unless I find a way to gain this fire, there may not be food for a long time."
My conscience voiced that comment in my head.
I sighed, it was sad but after many experiences in my previous jobs. I knew it was true. Still, I had to work, I had to keep on looking for jobs, even though the future was looking bleak.
On the road to the job interview, I ran into a street dancer, as they were rampant in this area. I was about to turn the other way, but there was something about her.
I don't know if it was the way she moved or the music she danced to. Her performance just seemed to draw me. It seemed to draw others too.
The way she danced, twisted, spun and shook her body to the music with a smile. Soon my heart felt warm and I started smiling.
I, who hasn't eaten since yesterday morning, was cheering for her like a madman. Although I wasn't the only one cheering as there was now a small crowd gathered and they were vibing too.
The show went on for 10 minutes and after that, people began dropping money into a hat. I ran to go drop the only change I had, into the hat. Then I began walking to my interview smiling like a fool.
A few ways on, I realized what I had just done, and how I had starved myself for another day.
I ran back to the street performer's space on the road and found her about to hail a bike and leave with my crumpled change.
I stopped her, screaming "Dancer, dancer!!", for I didn't know her name.
She looked at me, surprised at the fact that someone with a suit was running like a kid to his mother.
As I finally got to her, I noticed the stairs from other street walkers and even the bike man, who eventually stopped for her.
I stopped breathless from my earlier sprint
"Hey..." I began
"Ermmm hey" she replied. She had a very soft voice, made higher due to the fact she was clearly embarrassed at being approached like this. I opened my mouth to speak, then realized that I didn't know what to say.
I couldn't just ask her if she had a fire inside of her and if she could share some with me, right?
We stayed silent for more than 3 minutes. The bike man, clearly annoyed for being kept waiting, drove off, in search of more customers.
"You were at my show, right?" She asked.
"Yes I was...",I replied, thankful for something to help get the conversation moving.
"How was it?" She asked, holding her hands in her front and her head down.
"It was beautiful...", I said "I've never seen a more soulful dance, nor a better performance." I continued truthfully.
" Thanks." She said blushing.
"That's also why I came to meet you. I wanted to ask, how do you do it so well?How do you dance?"
She kept quiet for a moment, trying to make sense of the question, I was too.
"I think I dance the same way everybody dances,..." She finally replied. "I just listen to the music and move anyhow my body decides to move. I feel the beat of the music, coinciding with the fire in my heart, then I dance."
She said it, she has the fire in her heart too. I've finally found someone who could help me.
"How do you get this fire?" I asked her
"Ermmm, I don't think it's something you get.." she said while laughing softly.
"I think it coincides with the passion you have for whatever you're doing. It's that heat that drives you to do that action better and also gives you joy when you're doing it." She said while touching her chest and smiling.
I touched my chest too, remembering the warmth I felt when I watched her dancing.
"I need that fire,..." I knelt down telling her. "Please share it with me." I begged
"I'm so sorry,.." she said. "It's not something I can just up and share."
"You'll have to feel it for yourself, doing something you love."
Another bikeman drove by and she hailed and climbed on it.
"I'm sorry I couldn't be of help, you are always welcome to any of my shows. The fire I feel and that you want is inside you too. You just need that spark to light it." The bike man took off and I was left alone again.
I stood up though, at least the search had started to move forward, I know now what the fire is and I know how to light it. What's left is to get my spark.
So with an empty stomach but a full heart of hope. I walked confidently to my next interview, hoping I'll find my spark there....