Photo by: @rodgamag
There is no single or simple answer to the previous question. However, the slowing down of life since last year's pandemic has given me enough time to realize how children's lives are gestated in more detail to perhaps answer with some light as to why the existence of many children today is so empty.
During the current pandemic (global crisis), I have seen the best and the worst of us humans. If it was once readily apparent that the bag of problems we carried as a whole had many holes in it, it is now quite noticeable that it has been broken and we are submerged in the pile of problems. And one of the problems that I notice perhaps hinders our mobility the most is how to guide the little ones to lead a fulfilling life according to their goals and aspirations. Note that this problem is momentous as it involves the future of our society.
In most cases, I believe that there is no way to meet the non-material needs of children because we do not know who they really are. That is, there is no clarity about their human identity, their qualities or their potential. Then, it could be added that their parents do not have such clarity for themselves either. But, without wishing to broaden the issue that concerns me now, let us focus only on children.
The problem of identity is something fundamental in our lives. If we do not know who we are, how can we know where we are going, how we will get to the desired goals and, in any case, why we would strive to reach them? The discovery of our personal profile is, therefore, elementary to give meaning to life. This discovery does not have a specific time or age, but it should be encouraged in children whenever possible. And, perhaps, there is nothing better for this than paying attention to their words, actions, games, etc.
Although one cannot or should not accompany the new generations forever during the process of self-discovery, it is necessary to be there to be their guides, just as our ancestors were with us in the past. Whoever they were. Unfortunately, the quarantine has made me realize that very few are even available to attend to their kids (or themselves). More than once, for example, I saw parents having a thousand and one interests linked to technological or aesthetic banalities above the upbringing of their children.
And keep in mind that in a society where there are no bases, there will probably be no direction either. Only when we are clear about our own potentialities, it is possible to give course to our lives to feasible destinations for our personal fulfillment.
DIRECTION
Just as discovering one's personal profile is ageless, the same goes for giving direction to one's life. Childhood, however, is an ideal stage to lay the foundations for the possible paths that people may take throughout their lives. This question summarized in the "where to", could be seen as the same goals or aspirations that we propose to reach to ourselves. That is to say, they are the ones helping us to avoid stagnation or misdirection.
The more attention we pay to children, the more possibilities we will have to offer them maps of life according to the personal treasures they wish to achieve. Will there be cases where such maps cannot be provided? Of course there will be. You won't always have the resources required to serve as a compass for children, but you can at least try to leave them in the care of those who do.
FORM
If it is difficult to help children to position themselves on the right paths for them, it tends to be even harder to help them to overcome all the obstacles they may encounter in their way. In my opinion, this question is decisive since the "how" lies in the success of the realization of the children's goals.
You can have a lot of goals or plans, but when you have no idea how to carry them out, it is like having none at all. In this regard, it is very important to emphasize the role of organization. Once the resources and strategies are planned to make the realization of a goal, the vagaries of the projected paths can be significantly reduced.
In the same way, the presence of constancy in whatever methods are employed is relevant to have serious chances of success. In other words, no organization is worthwhile if it is not taken into account that success does not come just by taking two steps towards it.
Now, all this is relatively accessible to those parents whose circumstances allow it. But what about those children whose parents barely have enough to support themselves, how do the children progress? Again, it seems that the parents must seek help. In the end, I believe that the acceptance of outside help is one of the greatest favors we do ourselves when we are unable to do it alone in the vast solitude.
MOTIVE
This issue of loneliness has, in fact, been a common factor heightened during the pandemic. Being isolated many of us have preferred to live solely on what we can find on the internet through our electronic devices. Arguably, it has become the easiest way to replace that reality that has been restricted to us.
In this sense, I think that the motivation and many of the aspirations in people have been notably diluted, generating more confusions and misplacements than those that already existed previously in people. Naturally, parents are included. They lose the motives and the desire to move forward and their children will hardly be able to do anything different. Because, if the one who is supposed to be your guide is disoriented, how can you then continue on any favorable path being a tourist at the beginning of life?
The content of our existence is meaningless if there is no one or nothing to inspire us with reasons to live it to the fullest. And, although this attainment of existential reasons is free, it seems to be quite inaccessible for the majority. Even more so in a pandemic. It is as if there were a wall that prevents us from reaching the necessary motivation to move forward and we do not have anyone who can lend us a hand to jump over it and finally see what inspires us.
It is useless for children to have all kinds of possessions and advantages, if they do not know why they have what they have and why they strive to get what they want.
The location of the "why" in our lives undoubtedly means bliss insofar as it justifies our existence. It is basically the fuel that allows us to move through any path despite its challenges.
Unfortunately I see this fuel increasingly scarce in children. It seems to be extinguished before they even begin to walk properly. It would be nice if instead of imposing so many things on them (rain that extinguishes their inner flame), they were listened to more, for example. In most cases, the reasons that will drive their whole life lie in the child himself. So why not start being their collaborators instead of their imposers or despisers? I am not asking for anything excessive, trust me.
