I'd like to share with you something that's completely occupied my mind at the moment, as it has been in the past few days. Not a minute passes by without me thinking about her... Over, and over again. I told myself a while ago, that I shouldn't be obsessed with this, because it will cost a mortal $1.75-million, and that they've made so few of them to start with. I told myself to extinguish this fiery passion, because it's also hopelessly impractical.
If the thunders roar, and the clouds shower the earth with rain, you get soaked. If the sun beams with sunlight as you drive along in your redhead, you get sunburned. If someone litter from their car in front, you will get crap all over the both of you. Perhaps one of the most underrated changes throughout the automobile's evolution in the last century or so has been the creation of a roof, windows, and some doors to shield you from the elements. So, why should I be in love with a car that's so inconvenient to drive around?
Meeting Her Parents.
Credits to: Ferrari Monza SP2
Well, I reckon that if there's people who are endlessly devoted to motorcycles, then why shouldn't I fall in love with the Monza? The whole point of fun on two-wheels is the sense of freedom, openness, and one's exposure to the outside world. You're not cocooned in plush leather and a heater, tied by your seatbelt. You have the whole world at your fingertips, and in essence, the Monza has that same feeling. You're not worried about a little bit of rain, dust, mud, sunlight, or insects getting smacked on your face.
Put on a helmet, and all will be well, or at least slightly better. The difference, is that the Monza is bigger than a motorcycle, it doesn't topple over if you let go of it, and has three-times as many cylinders as the fastest super-bikes. It also brings some of that wildness that pre-war motorcars had, when drivers weren't worried about having their heads decapitated in the event of a crash. Some even preferred it, as they could just jump out of the car before it crumples beneath them.
But what is a Monza, anyways? The origins begin in the form of a legendary and historic racing circuit north of Milan, the Autodromo Monza. Built in 1922, this track has hosted racing, cycling, and even running. In the perspective of cars, it's most famous event is being put on the Italian stretch of the Formula 1 calendar. It hosts many quick straights that asks you to pin the throttle to the floor, just before throwing in tricky corners to set you back your lead. It's superbly challenging, and very dangerous, thus becoming one of my favourite circuits.
Credits to: Ferrari Monza SP1, 250 Testa Rossa, 750 Monza, and Ferrari 166 MM
The car that now bears this name marks a bold new path for Ferrari, not just as a business, but also a change on how they craft their cars. The Monza is a blend of new and old, a convergence point of Ferrari's storied traditions, artisan craftsmanship, combined with the leaps and bounds they've made in building a technological prowess that's second to none. While Ferrari will always keep moving forward, with little need to return to nostalgia, it doesn't hurt to look back every once in a while.
This new Monza takes inspiration from three iconic Ferraris - the 750 Monza, 250 Testa Rossa, and 166 S. For a bit of Ferrari trivia, if you're wondering to yourself, "Well, I came here for redheads, so where are they?". Well, 'Testa Rossa' stands for 'red-head'. This is to denote the distinctive bright red paintwork that Ferrari would coat the engine's cam-covers with. In fact, pop open the bonnet of any Ferrari today, and they still paint that crackly red finish on their powerplants.
Now, if you're a tad disappointed that there aren't any hot gingers here to mingle with, then worry not, as there's plenty of sensuous cars coming your way. Back to this Monza then, there's two of them - the SP1, and SP2. The difference is simple enough, as you can choose between having a focused single-seater, or to have an extra space for someone to tag along for the ride. If I recall correctly, 'SP' stands for 'Sport Prototype', but what does it all matter, when the car looks this jaw-dropping.
The First Escapade.
Credits to: Ferrari Monza SP1
I've had an entire year or so since it first launched, yet the Monza still never fails to take my breath way. To my eyes, this is easily the sexiest looking Ferrari of all time, and that even includes their classics. I dare say that Enzo himself would weep tears of joy looking at this magnificent creation bearing his name, if the Grand Old Man has been alive today. As mentioned before, the Monza has no roof, at all. There's not even a fabric cover to shield it quickly from rain, or someone stepping in to steal it.
Just like a motorcycle, you just have to get used to getting it wet and dirty. Some would call this roofless form-factor a 'speedster', but as the Italians do, I prefer to use the term, 'barchetta'. Translating to 'boat-tail', barchettas have no roof, often without a windscreen, and with minimal plushness in its interior that would get in the way of performance. Removing all that did have a positive effect on the Monza's diet, having shaved nearly half-a-tonne of mass from the relatively porky 812, of which it's based on.
This bodyline is unmistakably handsome, with a minimalism and cleanliness in a world where cars are getting so fast, that you'd need some vents here, and ducts there. Not on the Monza, and with the exception of side-vents, its bodywork flows smoothly from the low 'shark-nose' front-end, to the very subtle flick of a duck-tail spoiler. It also helps that the body is made from large pieces of carbon-fibre, making it appear as though the car is made from a single panel.
Credits to: ExclusiveCarRegistry - 1, 2, 3, and 4
This smooth bodywork incidentally works wonders as a blank canvas for painting your Monza in a host of sublime historic liveries, along with hand-painted Scuderia shields on the side. Stripes, two-tone, and anything else goes. The dimensions aren't exactly tiny, but chopping off the roof makes the Monza appear much smaller than it actually is. All that carbon-fibre makes itself present too, with a bare carbon front-spoiler, side-skirts, and a large rear-diffuser.
That's telling of how much work that Ferrari's aerodynamicists have done to keep all the ugly work of managing airflow underneath the car, out of sight. That said, there's aerodynamics in play on that stunning bodywork as well. Ferrari calls those vents in front of the driver a 'virtual-windscreen', rushing air upwards and creating an air-bubble to keep the weather and those pesky bugs away. Ensuring your hair isn't too messed up, are those hoops placed behind the seats, which also makes sure your skull doesn't get crushed in the event you'll flip your Monza over.
Entering the car is done by opening the tiny, and featherweight scissor doors. The interior is mostly the same as in any other Ferrari, with the familiar buttons, switches, screens, and driver-focused steering-wheel. In the Monza, it's more bare, with no carpets, and hard carbon-fibre panels everywhere. The seats are carbon-fibre buckets that keep you snug, while four-point racing harnesses hold you tightly in place. If you opt for the SP2, there's a carbon-fibre bridge that runs along the middle, for added rigidity.
Credits to: Ferrari Monza SP1
Very surprisingly for a very impractical car, there's a decent luggage space in the back. The boot is accessed by opening that large carbon-fibre clamshell, which is a single-piece included those hoops. It's the perfect place to store all the stuff that comes along with each one of the 500 Monzas. They include a fitted set of luggage, a tailored set of racing overalls, scarf, leather gloves, Oxford racing shoes, goggles, and a carbon-fibre helmet that's been finished with leather. Now this, is the sort of fashion I'm into.
You're certainly getting a lot for your money then, in a sense that Ferrari is actually giving you extra bits, free of charge. Perhaps this isn't entirely new, since old man Enzo once said that when you buy a Ferrari, you buy an engine, and he throws in the rest for free. Indeed, the Monza has a jewel of a monstrous engine, just underneath that equally massive carbon-fibre clamshell. One of the carryovers from the 812 is its 6.5-litre, naturally-aspirated V12. Alone, it's one of the most powerful engines to ever come out of a Prancing Horse.
Credits to: Ferrari Monza SP2
Car enthusiasts often look for different things in a car. Although I don't have much technical expertise to understand an engine inside and out, I do lovingly appreciate how that engine makes me feel. This V12, evolved from the Ferrari Enzo nearly 20 years ago, is at the top of my 'favourite engines' list. In the Monza, it outputs 800hp, and 530lb-ft of torque, both which can prove to be quite a handful, especially given how light the Monza. Acceleration is a sprightly 2.9-seconds from 0-100km/h, although top-speed has been reduced to 299km/h.
That is the consequence of having no roof, but no doubt, your hairdo will thank Ferrari for that one. I can imagine the driving experience to be quite a thrill. Not only do you have the same uninterrupted view like an F1 driver, you also have less in the way of hearing that sonorous V12 sing proudly, filling the air around you. It's not an easy car to drive, feeling as though you're constantly trying to wrangle a wild beast, all the while exposed to the wilderness. Every drive is a challenge, yet the rewards are bountiful, filling you with joy that you never knew existed inside your soul.
A Proposal...?
Credits to: Ferrari Monza SP2
They say writing is a good way for a person to get something off their chest, and that same thing happens to me, too. If I write about a car, all that research and pondering that I've put into an article brings me a renewed perspective of said car, both the good, and the bad. It gives me a chance to think more about it, and maybe learn a thing or two in the meanwhile. Plus, it helps a lot to calm my dumbfounded excitement, and temper any excess of obsession. This suddenly sounds like a great relationship advice, honestly.
It's unhealthy, and it's somewhat worked out before. I'm hoping that by writing more on this Monza, maybe my lustful passion for this hopelessly impractical, egregiously expensive, and wholly attention-seeking redhead would end. So far, it hasn't helped. If anything, it's made me fall in love even more with her. If you're a love doctor, then I'd appreciate a prescription. Otherwise, I think I'm going to need a wedding ring soon. I'm just grinning at the thought of Monza, me, and a wonderful piece of mountain road, just the two of us... Forever. Please, send help.
