The blame game is something we all have played once or twice in our lives. The rule of the game is quite simple "if you want to avoid consequences, just point fingers at someone else". Which is why it is very easy to play. Most times, we don't think about how blame game affects us and more especially the people we point those fingers at.
Having so many older siblings while growing up meant that I didn't have to take take so much responsibility over certain things. If I made a mistake, like breaking a cup while getting water for myself, my parents would blame my older siblings. They would say, "If you had given her water when she wanted it, then maybe she wouldn't have broken the cup". Typically, it was always easy to get away with things because there were just people who they felt could have done it better.
At that time, I was just a small kid who didn't know much about how things worked. I didn't understand that my actions could cause trouble for others. My siblings took the blame for me, and I didn't think much about it. However, my eyes wasn't too small to notice how sad my siblings became when they had to get shouted at because of what I did.
As time went by, all my siblings left home and started their own families. I also grew up. Now, I don't have anyone to take the blame when I mess up things around the house. If something goes wrong, it's either I admit it was my fault or I don't.
There have been times when other people tried to blame me after they made mistakes. They tried to find a way to make it seem like I did something wrong so I would get some of the scoldings or punishments. It didn't feel nice at all. It made me think of those days when my siblings used to take the blame for me.
I learned some important things. Sometimes, people are more willing to forgive you if you take responsibility for the mistake you made. Excuses are just temporary. In the end, you are the reason why things didn't go well. It's better to admit it and try to make things right.
Blaming others over bad things that happen might seem fun until it's your turn to be blamed. Then you find out that it's no fun at all. It's not fair to make someone else feel bad for something you did. Admittedly, it's not always easy to say "yes, it was my fault", but I learned saying that automatically makes you the bigger person. People see that you are responsible. They might even respect you more. It also helps fix the problem faster because everyone can focus on making things better instead of arguing about whose fault it is and saves the energy of back and forth pointing of fingers.
Playing the blame game doesn't help anyone. It can hurt people's feelings and make them angry. It can break friendships and make it hard to work together. Owning up to your mistakes shows that you care about others and want to make things right. If a mistake does occur, which is sometimes unavoidable, I believe the way forward is looking for a solution and not looking for whose fault it is.
In life, we all make mistakes. That's okay. What's important is how we deal with them. People who are always quick to point fingers are more or less not willing to invest any energy to correct a mistake so they just try to hook it up around some else' neck. Blaming others might seem easy, but it's not the best way. Taking responsibility might be harder at first, but it feels better in the long run. It helps us grow and become better people.
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