Images Generated with Meta AI
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about parenting and the reason why someday I also will become a father to my children and what example I would lay down for them and how I would train them to believe those thoughts usually come to my mind a and some people think their children need to go through certain hardships to “understand life.” But honestly, I’m not fully convinced by that mindset. Let’s be real for a second are we helping our children grow by doing that, or are we just repeating the same mistakes our parents made?
To me, it feels like history is just going in circles. One generation struggles, and when they finally make it, they turn around and expect the next generation to suffer the same way so they can learn from it that rubbish if you ask me. But I disagree with that. If every parent keeps thinking that way, then what’s the point of growth? How do we expect things to change if we keep handing our children the same pain we carried or burden?
Let's view it this way: If I struggled to meet life needs and then I let my child struggle the same way, and then my child does the same to their child how are we not just passing down suffering like a family tradition or Curse Rather? Children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren… all repeating the same cycle. At some point, someone has to stand up and break it. Otherwise, what exactly is the role of a parent?
As far as I’m concerned, being a parent means setting a new standard. It means using the lessons you learned the hard way to clear a better path for your child. It’s not about letting them fall into the same holes you fell into just to “build character.” No, your job is to remove those obstacles or at least guide them around them so they can focus on facing new challenges, not recycling your old ones.
We love to say, “let them learn the hard way,” but what if there’s a better way? Better option for them to learn? What if we, as parents, fought the battles they shouldn’t have to fight? What if we took the hits life threw at us so our kids can walk a little easier and dream a little bigger? That, to me, is how you raise strong, wise, and independent children not by letting them suffer, but by preparing them for the future.
By the time I would become a parent, I had already made a decision that I would not let my children go through the same bitterness I had gone through. I won’t use my past as an excuse to throw them into the fire and call it “life training.” No. I’ll use my past as fuel to create a better life for them so they can look at me and say, “I’m proud of you, Dad,” not because I exposed them to pain, but because I protected them from it.
Yes, I’ll teach them about life. I’ll guide them. I’ll prepare them. But I won’t let them suffer just to prove a point. They’ll face their struggles when the time comes but those struggles will be theirs, not mine.
That’s my theory. That’s my goal. And I stand on it fully.
TAP TO JOIN DISCORD
ABOUT AUTHOR
