I think a lot, sometimes too much I'd say. So much so that my head fills with so many things it feels like it'll explode, or overflow at the very least. It hasn't yet, which is a good thing I guess; An exploding noggin seems like a rather final event to me and it's probably best that it doesn't happen.
Much of what I have spinning around in my head is situational. At work it's work and I have a learned-ability to draw a line beneath it when not there. It's a skill I'm proud of. In my real life, outside of work, I have a lot happening and it's those thoughts that spin in that pumpkin-sized head of mine. I don't mind of course, I am a thinker, but sometimes it gets the better of me.

Day time - Torrens River overlooking the footbridge and Convention Centre - Adelaide, South Australia.
I think about now and the future a lot, but the past also. I'm not one to dwell on the past but reflecting on it certainly helps me order my now and future thoughts through experience I've gained previously.
There's always benefit, but alas regret also. It's the flipside of the positive aspects of self and past reflection I suppose.
I've been thinking about a recent event in which, to my shame, I failed to stand up and beside a person I value immensely and, I'll be honest, it plagues me. I cant go back and change my failure, and the person has spoken to me at length, allayed my own feelings of remorse and self-loathing over my non-action...But I feel it there and when it's dark and silent, at night when I try to sleep, it haunts me. My failing, and other things. Sleep often eludes me.
Yes, another thing to add to my growing list of unpleasant life-moments to deal with; This one of my own creation.

Night time - Taken about six months later. The same, but different.
One thing I have learned though, is that there's a way forward; Always. One just has to find it. There's a balance, an opposite like night and day, shadow and light, good and bad, love and hate.
I spoke to that person yesterday, the one I left alone and isolated to face a disgusting onslaught of hateful words and personal attack. I said how proud I was of how it was handled and that the person has the courage to remain standing; It shows resilience, ownership and responsibility. I also told them that I'll stand next time, right along side. It was well-received.
I look at these images and see reflections viewed from the same spot, only at completely different moments and it makes me think of my own internal reflections...Depending on when they take place, they can be vastly different, mean different things and come to different resolutions. And that's how it should be...That's why I reflect a lot. It brings solutions...And lack of sleep but I'll accept the latter to achieve the former.
Design and create your ideal life, don't live it by default - Tomorrow isn't promised so be humble and kind
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