Welcome to my daily blog!
Since I have already shared my student nurse journey with you, in this blog, I will now share how I earned my registered nurse license. In this post, you will be inspired by how I persevered to achieve my dream of becoming a licensed nurse, despite all the challenges I faced. The journey to becoming a registered nurse has been a transformative experience, filled with moments of self-doubt, triumph, and personal growth, all leading to the rewarding opportunity to make a meaningful impact on patients' lives. As I mentioned in my previous blog, nursing wasn't my first choice. However, after spending four years in nursing school, I deepened my knowledge and understanding of how nurses transform lives. Over time, I came to love my course more and more, each and every day.
In January 2023, the fresh start of the year, I was hesitant to take the board exam. Aside from the expense, my mental health wasn’t ready, and my emotional state was fragile. I hadn't yet recovered from the loss of my father in September 2022, and my focus at that moment was on myself wondering how I would cope if I wasn't ready. I had a lot of 'what ifs,' such as, 'What if I fail?' or 'What if I don’t pass?' We all know that the board exam is one of the biggest exams in the Philippines. Many candidates not only from the Visayas but also from Mindanao and Luzon anywhere in the Philippines where nursing courses are offered. November wasn’t just any month; it was a month full of pressure because it marked the first time that future nurses would take the board exam.
Fast forward, I told my aunt that maybe I would not take the exam because I was scared, and financially, we were still recovering. Then, she made an offer—she offered to cover all the board exam expenses, including the review fees and a gadget where I could store all the files needed for the review. I couldn't say no because it was a great opportunity, but at the back of my mind, I kept asking myself, 'Am I ready?' Despite my doubts and hesitation, I decided to join the review class.
On the first day of class, we had a 500-item refresher exam. I was shocked. I wasn’t prepared. I thought the board exam review would be similar to a usual school setting, but I was wrong. It was completely different. Imagine, every question felt like pressure. When you answered, you still had doubts because all the choices seemed similar, and you had to find the most perfect answer. It felt like my knowledge had reset to zero; it was as if I was still a freshman at that moment.
After answering all 500 items on the refresher exam, the review coordinator explained to us that the board exam is structured like that. In short, we had five subjects to focus on, each with 100 questions. Out of all the majors in my 1st year to 4th year nursing program, only five were relevant to the board exam: NP1: Community Health Nursing, NP2: Maternal and Child Nursing, NP3: Palmer and Medical-Surgical 1, NP4: Medical-Surgical 2, and NP5: Psychiatric Nursing. These were the subjects we needed to tackle day by day, as they were the areas covered by the Board of Nursing. At that time, all I could ask myself was, 'Is my decision the right one?.'
Sleepless nights, tiring days, and every day I felt drained from all the topics covered during the review. I couldn't even eat breakfast. From Monday to Sunday, I had review sessions from 7 a.m. to 6 p.m. It was exhausting because I had to travel 50 minutes to an hour just to get to the city for the review. Since then, I decided to go home to Danao every day, thinking I could focus better on studying in my room. But sometimes, I couldn't even sleep. I would arrive home around 9 p.m. to 10 p.m., study until dawn, and then prepare to leave again at 5 a.m. and repeat the cycle. It was truly exhausting. I cried every day to ease the emotions, and I even had breakouts due to stress. But I kept going because I didn’t want to fail the board exam. I wanted my aunt to feel that her expenses were truly worth it, and I wanted to make my parents proud, especially my father. As the months went by, the board exam was quickly approaching, and my graduation day and review classes overlapped. I had very little time to celebrate, and I had to take time off just to spend with my family.
You know what’s interesting about my review? All the instructors came from the University of Sto. Tomas, my dream school. I was intimidated by their knowledge and how determined they were to teach us exam strategies. They always taught us shortcuts and showed us how to identify hints in the questions to help us find the correct answer. Despite the pressure we felt, they kept us motivated, reminding us that we could achieve more and that we could do it. They are very witty and determined. Even though not all of us are fast learners or able to grasp the topics easily, they always go back to the areas where we have difficulties in understanding.
In Philippine tradition, as a board exam taker, you are expected to do a 'Bisita Iglesia,' where you visit 6-7 sacred churches and bring items needed for the exam to be blessed by a priest or bishop. You also write petitions and pray for success in the board exam. I visited six churches in Cebu: Simala Shrine in Sibonga, Archbishop Teofilo Camomot Shrine, Pitalo San Vicente Ferrer, Cebu Metropolitan Cathedral, Basilica Minore del Sto. Niño, and Carmelite Monastery Cebu. At each church, I lifted up everything including my stress, my pressure, and the board exam itself. I lit a candle and prayed, asking that if it is God’s will for me to pass, He would be with me when the exam comes.
I always manifest that in December 2023, when the board exam results are released, I will see my name on the list, and I hope to pass on my first try. I even cried from all the pressure I was feeling. My mental health wasn’t in a good state anymore; I overthink everything and had frequent breakdowns. I am also manifesting that, if it is God’s will, I will be able to put my picture and a gratitude letter on the Simala bulletin board, showing that I made it.
Since I am the type of person who tends to be a sleepyhead, I slept a lot during the review, especially when my mind was tired. My friends would send me pictures of me sleeping, and I couldn’t deny it. This was about 8-9 months of review class. At that point, I felt like I had already lost my motivation and wasn’t reviewing seriously anymore. Every time we had a 500-item exam, I couldn’t even get a passing score. Out of 100 for each subject, I was scoring 27, 30, 45, 56, and 72, repeatedly. See? It was very exhausting, and I started to lose hope, thinking I wouldn’t be able to pass the board exam with scores like that. I became increasingly absent from the review classes. I even went to a concert at SM City and, worse, spent time out with other friends. I wasn’t focused anymore, and I told myself, 'Enough, I’m tired.' My mother was constantly pressuring me, and I always felt guilty. That’s why, in October 2023, I decided to stop attending the in-house review and instead review on my own.
Reviewing on my own was very difficult. I didn’t know where to start. I didn’t even know which areas were the hardest for me or what subjects I needed to focus on. Worse, I didn’t know what my study habits were. I was confused. At the back of my mind, I wanted to withdraw my application to the PRC, thinking I would not take the exam in November and instead wait until I felt ready. Eventually, I slowly figured everything out and got back on track. I used YouTube to search for Astig Nurse and his Huling Bulong, and through that, I was able to understand and study everything. You know, sometimes you need someone to motivate you in everything. In my case, I had my boyfriend with me. He was my shoulder to lean on when I cried, and I could always count on him to listen whenever I needed to rant about my feelings and emotions. Even though we were in a long-distance relationship at the time, he always motivated me, reminding me that I could do it and pass the board exam. When I studied, he was always there to support me and put a smile on my face.
Two days before the board exam, final empowerment. Anxiety filled my entire body. My mental health was unstable, my emotions were unbearable, and the pressure was at its highest level. I kept questioning myself, 'Am I really prepared?' I was paranoid and overthinking, and at that time, I developed a high fever because of the stress. I knew I had to cope because I wanted to win this battle. I wanted to make everyone proud of me, and I wanted to be proud of myself. I prayed every day, hoping I could make it in one take.
During the remaining days before the board exam, I cried so much because I couldn't take the pressure anymore. I wanted to scream and let it all out. It wasn’t an easy road. If I were to pass, it would be the greatest achievement of my entire life.
November 11-12, 2023 — board exam day. I lifted everything to the Lord. I meditated and procrastinated on reviewing shortly before entering the assigned school. I felt a bit lonely as I watched my colleagues go to the venue with their families, while I was riding a Move It to avoid being late. My colleagues had delicious food to comfort them, while I only had a piece of graciousa bread for lunch because I was short on money. When I entered the school, I saw people crying at every corner of the premises. I tried not to cry, but tears fell down. I was aware of the pressure, yet I tried to stay focused and calm for the exam. When I entered the room, I made the sign of the cross and, as I sat in my seat, I prayed harder.
Day 1 of the examination, I focused on each question. I made sure to understand them, and whatever answer came to mind first became my final answer without hesitation. As much as possible, I wanted to finish the exam early so I wouldn't feel the pressure.
Day 2 of the examination—finally, the last day to end this battle. I was eager to finish it all. I knew I might not be fully confident in my answers, but I was pretty sure I did my best. For NP 5, the last subject, I was the first one to finish. Then the proctor said, 'I’ve noticed you’re always the first one to finish the exam.' She looked at my last name and added, 'Okay, Dy. I’ll look for your name on the results to see if you pass.' I smiled at her. As I left the room, I felt a heavy heart from what the proctor had said, and I thought, 'What if she’s right? What if I don’t pass?' When I went downstairs, I saw a lot of people waiting for their loved ones and heard loud drums congratulating them in advance. I went straight to Sto. Niño because I want to pray for everything and be thankful I finished the exam.
After the board exam, I decided to apply to the call center industry again. To ease the pressure and anxiety, I needed something to keep me busy. Since the results would take a while due to the large number of candidates over 30,000 future RNs. I used to be silent all the time. I wasn’t vocal about how I really felt. I lost hope once again and thought that maybe I hadn’t passed the board exam, or that perhaps nursing wasn’t meant for me. There were a lot of questions in my mind. Sometimes, I just cried; other times, I just felt sad.
Our class group chat was chaotic because everyone was tracking the release of the results, which was set for December 1, 2023. At that moment, I wasn’t excited; I knew I hadn’t passed the exam. On December 1, 2023, there was no update from the PRC that the results were out. At that point, I stopped hoping. I went out that night for a walk on the Mactan Bridge for about an hour and continued working at the call center. When I got home, there was an earthquake. During that time, my boyfriend messaged me saying that the PRC had posted an update. When I checked, I saw the message: 'NLE RESULT IS OUT.
On December 1, 2023, at 11:03 PM, the Nursing Licensure Examination results were released! When I tried to access the Google Drive, I couldn’t open it because too many people were trying to access it, causing it to crash. I couldn’t find my name, and that’s when I cried, ready to accept failure. Then, my cousin messaged me and said, 'Congratulations, Ate, you passed!' I was completely shocked. I didn’t believe him at first, so I asked for a screenshot. When he sent it to me, I saw that it was true—I had passed the exam! When my boyfriend checked, it was confirmed that I really passed, and when I verified it myself, I couldn’t believe it. Wow!
Tears suddenly fell down. I was so incredibly happy. I called my aunt and told her I passed the board exam, and she cried. She said she never doubted me because she knew I could do it. When I called my mom and woke her up to tell her the news, she cried too and kept saying thank you. I didn’t know how to feel. At that moment, I realized I was finally a registered nurse. I couldn’t sleep. Finally! One take, and in November 2023, I earned my license. Four years in nursing school, plus one year of review for this exam was all worth it. I am finally ELYSSA GWEEN MARIZ I. DY, RN.
To everyone who has hesitations about taking the board exam, I understand how overwhelming and uncertain the journey can feel. I, too, had my doubts about whether I was truly ready, fears about failing, and worries about the pressure. But let me tell you this: You are capable. Yes, the road may be tough. Yes, you may question your abilities along the way. But don’t let that stop you. The board exam is not just a test; it’s a reflection of how far you’ve come, the knowledge you've gained, and the strength you’ve built to face challenges head-on. If you're unsure, remember that it's okay to feel nervous, and it’s okay to doubt yourself at times. But also know that there is always room for growth, and your dreams are worth fighting for. Take it one step at a time, trust the process, and believe in yourself. Surround yourself with the right people who will encourage and support you. When you feel overwhelmed, remember why you started. Your hard work will pay off. And when you look back, you’ll see that every struggle, every sleepless night, and every moment of doubt was all worth it. You’ve got this. Don’t let fear hold you back from achieving what you deserve.
Take that first step, and you will find your way.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read and connect with my thoughts today. I’m excited to continue sharing my journey with you, and I hope you found something here that resonated or sparked an idea. This blog is a space for growth, inspiration, and conversation, and I’d love to hear your thoughts, feedback, or experiences in the comments. Feel free to share if something stood out to you. Here’s to many more stories, lessons, and moments of connection ahead! See you in the next post!