incipit report
alright where was i. i think i was out singing in the rain today. yes, that’s where i was. there’s no other explanation for getting 18277 steps in today. yes, i was definitely out singing in the rain. getting in my 18277 steps. in the rain. while singing. as i sprinted down side alleys and straight through crowds and directly into traffic, with several hundred thousand in a pack on my back and the pigs in hot pursuit. usually it only takes me 15 or 16k steps to outrun the pigs but today was different. they’re using quicker pigs these days so i guess i’ll have to adapt by getting quicker myself. either that, or i’ll just have to quit singing while running. really slows you down, trying to sing and sprint at the same time. note to self, save the singing for after you’ve outrun the pigs.
explicit report
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