As Social beings, we've certainly experienced being hurt, disappointed, or betrayed. And the most painful thing is when we're betrayed by our own best friend.
When we're hurt by a friend, even someone we consider a brother, we feel the pain of betrayal, and beyond that, our social relationships become strained and trust diminishes.
Some people seek revenge, but of course, revenge is not good for our mental and psychological health. Revenge also only perpetuates the chain of hatred and prolongs the chain of hostility.
I, too, was betrayed by a best friend. I'm the type of person who, after being disappointed or betrayed by someone three times, will no longer trust them, no matter the reason.
There are three things I do when I lose trust due to betrayal by my best friend.
Keep Your Distance
By keeping your distance, I mean don't get too close. Stay neutral, like you would when driving with a stranger. By maintaining distance, I also mean maintaining a neutral stance: not showing hatred through body language, such as eye contact or speech.
Forgive But Don't Forget
Perhaps because I dislike hostility, the attitude I often adopt when a friend betrays me is to forgive their mistake but not forget it.
Forgiving someone who hurts us, especially a friend, is not easy; it requires a long process. It begins with a battle between the mind and the feelings. Nevertheless, forgiving someone's mistakes is important, because it is not good to harbor resentment and hatred in our hearts.
However, don't forget their mistakes. This doesn't mean we are not sincere in our forgiveness. In fact, by not forgetting their mistakes, we will be more careful and vigilant in our social relationships.
- Don't Care
This third attitude is what I adopt when encountering a stubborn friend. Even though they know they are wrong, they blame others. The type of person who finds it difficult to admit mistakes is the type we should treat with an attitude of "don't care."
If I've implemented steps 1 and 2 and my friend is being unreasonable and thinks they're always right, I think step 3 is the best option. Because not everything needs to be taken seriously. It's a shame to waste our physical energy dealing with people like that.
So, what do you do when you're betrayed by your own friends? Are you the same as me? Let's share!
