With all these sexual misconduct accusations being thrown around, I'm thinking eventually Tom Cruise is going to come out and finally admit to the guy he had to let fuck him in the ass to get his career started. I'm thinking also that accusations will have to be made against Tom Hanks. He's just too cool; too boy-next-door/America's male sweetheart-esque. Halle Berry, too, now that I'm thinking about Cloud Atlas. You know she's hiding something. And Quentin Tarantino. Bieber will have to come out as a victim of whoever found him. There's no way anyone so self-destructive wasn't molested. All the tats and behavioral outbursts totally give it away. Michael Jackson was innocent! He was just weird.