And She Was Like we live in a culture of comparison:
"My neighbours have a dog and a car, I don't even have a dog. I bought a car, however it's not impressive enough in comparison to my colleague's car. I bought a cool car, but I don't have enough money to install the stereo system inside. On a bigger scale...I'm 25 years old, my father wishes I earn 3 times more than his friend's daughter does, but I still haven’t finished my master degree, it's awkward when people say - you are looser, or indicate their success as the standard for others”.
Sounds familiar to you? At least partially? We're always trying to compare the quality and standards of our lives with someone else. Women compare their wardrobe with friends and enemies. Men compare their cars with the boss's car. Start up interpreters compare their projects with competition. Journalist compares his local newspaper to one, owned by some big shot. Even kids are crying when they got less of a present that a school friend, or neighbour’s kid. By the way, children's comparison is forgivable, as they perceive the world through comparison. However, something has happened to you and you can't stop play this endless game of comparison and competition even when you are not a kid anymore?
Look at yourself in the mirror. Remember who you were and what you did 10 years ago. And 5 years ago. A year ago. Just a year ago. What had changed in a bad way? In a good way? It were more of good days than bad days, isn't it? Why you compare yourself with someone if you live your life, not someone else's? I can't be fully sure if grass is greener on the other side (or how else to indicate that visible success). But I can definitely analyse what I have changed in myself. It doesn't matter what field we are talking about: quit smoking, embroider skills, success in finishing marathon or simply ability to get things done on time when couple of years ago you would not do it. You grew up - not in age, but with your skills, abilities and willpower, concentration, ability to set goals and to achieve it. Praise yourself for this achievement. Don't forget to compare yourself today and yourself yesterday. Think about what else you do wrong and how to improve it. Think from this perspective in order to change your life to your favour.
Be grateful to yourself for changes you made. Be as for bad experience as for good one. This experience taught you that you are the source of your success and your failure. What is the point to compare you with someone who is more rich, more successful, healthier, more impudent or cynical? Disappointment, depression, aggravation or complacency (like I'm better than all this bad people). Are you sure you do miss this kind of feeling in your life? Stress, nor negativity or self-glorification do not make you better and definitely don't help to achieve small or big goals. After comparing yourself in a time range you will notice positive change. You will get rid off illusion and will learn how to set up your goals. You won't exist in a Wonderland, won't be naive anymore, you will find yourself ready for certain actions and words.
You accomplished something. Your own success is much more important for you that success of those, who you were always comparing yourself to. A source of inspiration and motivation as well as spiritual, physical, material, moral and emotional growth is all inside us. Religion, money, politics, power, tittle on your badge given by someone else do not make you more pure or closer to person you want to become. Only you can make it happen.
Maybe you should stop starring at comparison reflection in the mirror? Look closer. I'm 99% sure if you compare yourself with yourself before, you would find many good changes that you could be proud of without material and carrier garbage or loud compliments.
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...is something that my world spins on
What is your world about?
