Disclaimer: Please mute me if you are easily offended, my posts are intended for open-minded 18+ adults only.
I realize haters and trolls on here are inevitable. You can make fun of me/judge me if you want, lol.... I'm sure it happens more often than I'd like to imagine. But I know I'm a good person, how I feel about myself is most important. I definitely don't care about what people who don't know/care about me think. Please don't assume you know everything about me either from this post. @celsogoya suggested that I write a little more about myself....
So community on here can have a deeper view into my perspective.
I guess I'll start with why/how I got into porn.......
I've lived on my own since the day I turned 18, by choice.
I quit my full-time job of being a receptionist at a property management group, to do porn. Since I had to pay for full-time daycare too, which was almost as much as my rent... so I was also dancing at a stripclub on the weekends in addition to working full time, to be able to pay for everything. I had a son and was married at 18, divorced at 20 (left after the second time he physically abused me), and I'm 22, almost 23 now.
So yeah, I quit because I didn't want to have to spend so many hours working and away from my son, just to barely make enough to get by. Self-inquired to an adult agency online, and got signed same day. Been shooting almost 2 years now, as I said in my introduction post, haven't regretted quitting my full-time job since fortunately I've been working fairly steadily since I've started. I really enjoy doing porn though, since I'm comfortable with my body/sexuality, love traveling/new experiences and am unconventional in nature, otherwise I wouldn't be doing it. I'm not doing porn because I feel I don't have other options or that sex is my only skill, no that is not why I do what I do. Just remember guys, modesty empowers some... and exhibition empowers others, everyone is different.
I also, have my real estate license. I just did my post-licensing course & renewed it over the summer.... even though I'm not doing anything with it right now. I'm only allowed to represent buyers/sellers in new homes, HUD homes, auction homes, and commercial property transactions currently..... until I join the realtor's association, which costs $1,500, then $100/month after that. But I have to get a car again first, since a friend of mine totaled the car I had, this past summer.. and doesn't have any money to repay me. I should be able to get a new car by the end of the year though!
So yeah, I have my real estate license as a backup plan basically for when/if I decide to quit porn. I plan to do it part time here and there too, once I have car and join association.
As far as my personal life,
I'm bisexual and polyamorous (realized I'm non-monogamous at heart after my marriage).
Here are some quotes (from book 'Spiritual Polyamory' by Mystic Life) about polyamory if you don't quite understand what it entails:
"If you are polyamorous, it doesn't matter whether or not you have zero, one, two, or more lovers. Polyamory is a philosophy that is about non-possessive love. Embracing this philosophy is non-quantitative and arises from a desire to experience the giving and receiving of love without conditions."
"The remembrance that you as an individual are completely whole is crucial. If you feel dependent on multiple partners that is just as unhealthy (if not more unhealthy) than being dependent in a monogamous relationship. Remember that love is an expansion of your wholeness, but that nobody should be treated as a 'vital organ' that you need for survival."
I have an amazing girlfriend... she is a crazy Aquarian, like me... and simply, the sweetest, most genuinely caring/loving female I've met in a while. She is a nurse fulltime, which I respect so much, that she has the strength and determination to handle such an emotionally difficult career choice. She also, is a raver, used to be a dancer in Bay Area, and does erotic type of modeling from time to time. I am dominant with her, sexually, although I would not want the same dynamic with a male... I prefer to be submissive with men. But there's not many guys that I believe are worthy of my submission.
Sex on camera is def not the same as sex in personal life, there's a lot more factors to pay attention to when filming (like making sure penetration is visible), it's just a lot more technical too (like this many minutes in this position, this many minutes in this position), and I don't necessarily always have chemistry with the performer I'm working with, so sometimes acting is required. That is a part of being a performer. I don't fake things in my personal life though, I have meaningless sex for money.. I don't want meaningless sex for free in my personal life, want it to be with someone I at least have a connection/friendship with. But I get tested every 12-14 days to be able to work, so I can't afford to be reckless and am really hesistant about fucking out of industry guys for that reason.
As far as my health, I don't do any hard drugs or drink alcohol, just THC to maintain my sanity. I did a lot of hard drugs in my young teens (13-16), since I grew up in Vegas, so I've definitely gotten past my reckless stage in life. I honestly, did a lot of damage to my brain, doing so much ecstasy at 14.... I had serotonin deficiency syndrome for years, before I was able to basically cure it/build back my serotonin production by taking 1000mg of Tryptophan (since I researched and found out 5-htp is only a temp fix for as long as you keep taking it, and doesn't actually do anything to build back production, since tryptophan is what creates 5-htp in your brain) every night for 30 days. So thankfully, since then, I wake up feeling refreshed and productive every morning, rather than waking up dreading everything. Made such a difference in my quality of life.
I don't eat fast food, I haven't microwaved anything in 4 years, I do at least 50 squats with hand weights in a day, ingest as much protein as I can to attempt to gain weight (since I have to eat a lot to maintain my weight cus fast metabolism), and drink a lot of water.
My parents know what I do, no I definitely didn't tell them... my old coworker decided it was her business to spread once I started. Of course they aren't completely okay with it, but I'm adult/live on my own and I still have a good relationship with both of them because they see that the industry hasn't made me into a bad person, a drug addict, or irresponsible.
They both support me in doing whatever makes me happy.
As far as my hobbies, I enjoy hanging out with my son, eating, sleeping, listening to music/dancing, and only time I really go out, is to drum n bass shows because I am very passionate about that kind of music and love to dance to it/hear on nice speakers. I make dance videos occasionally. Here's my 2 most recent dance videos I made, in case anyone wants to watch them. Was when my hair was still brown though.
Here's a PG pic first, since screenshot of my dance video has my booty hanging out:
