Yesterday we went for lunch at a nearby restaurant. We were in the mood for a quiet peaceful afternoon just to relax and enjoy ourselves after a long hard week. It was calm and quiet, and we ordered our drinks and perused the menu to see what we wanted to order for lunch. We weren't in a hurry, as we had the whole afternoon in front of us.... We had a great view of the ocean and we felt very fortunate to be able to enjoy life like this.
HOWEVER our peace and quiet did not last very long.....
In a matter of seconds, our lunch turned into a nightmare. Three screaming children and two very exhausted parents walked into the restaurant and chose a table right next to us.
Now don't understand me incorrectly.... I have my own children. I even like children. But....mostly if they behave properly.
I also know that children are just children. They are young and carefree and may see and experience the world differently than us. I am all for freedom to express yourself and to be heard when necessary...
BUT but these 3 wild children were not from earth..... They either escaped from hell, or they were thrown out!
The restaurant was turned upside down in a matter of minutes. Children were running around, crawling under the tables, and did not care what their parents told them to do. It was like they were completely deaf to the pleads of their obedient parents. I could not believe this, and it made me think!!!
I was brought up in a world where children should be seen and not heard. I was brought up to respect my parents and my elders. I did not backchat. I did not try my luck to negotiate some kind of a deal with my parents if they said no to something I wanted. I just did not do it.!
So what exactly is wrong in this family?
The mommy seemed so tired... as if she gave up on the world a long time ago. She tried her best to get everyone seated properly, but gave up in a matter of seconds. The father was more interested to order drinks than to worry about his children misbehaving and causing havoc in a public restaurant.
Worst of all, they did not even seem bothered about the whole situation. For them it was just another day. What these two ignorant parents do not realize, is that these three little brats are going to grow up and be HORRIBLE grownups. If these little brats are left to do what they want, whenever they want, it is going to cause A LOT of issues when they are grownups!
You bend a tree branch when it is still young. Old branches do not be bend easily!
I see this more and more. Children misbehaving towards their parents, elders, teachers and peers. Why do you think this is happening?A child should be taught respect and A CHILD should know that there are definite consequences for certain actions. How will they EVER learn what is wrong and what is right if no one teaches them?
People are scared to punish their children with all the "children rights" these days. According to me...children have too many rights as it is. Imagine this: Children threatening their parents with the police and court cases if they are punished. This actually happens, and made me think of this Russel Peter video.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G6xNrUzjVPE
SO CAN WE TURN THIS AROUND? Some great parenting advice!
There is no rule book for raising children. Sometimes if we struggle with situations with our own children, we ask for advice from our parents, family members or friends, on how to handle a particular situation. If I don't know how to handle a situation with my own children, I usually phone my sister in law (who is according to me the best mother in the whole world! @naomi.louise)
Here's a few questions you should answer to see if YOU are on the correct path to great parenthood.
- Do you punish your child when he/she does something wrong? If you answered no, then you are screwed. You should punish a child. How else will they learn what is wrong and what is right? I am not talking about severe corporal punishment or child abuse here. A timeout corner should do, or even take away some of their favorite toys/phone/computer/wifi BUT a child should know that their are consequences to certain actions.
- Do you buy your child everything he/she wants? If you answered yes, then you are also screwed. You should not do that! That is why you keep on buying...they get so used to getting what they want that they don't value things anymore.
- Do you not teach your children to respect others? Hmmm, if you did not, they will grow up to be disrespectful towards their husbands and wives and they will teach that to their own children one day. Where are we going to end up here?
- Do you teach your child to behave properly in public? Well, you should. There is nothing more irritating that a screaming child in public! What is even more irritating is a parent that does nothing. Do not give up. People will not dislike you if you punish your child. Children should learn that there are consequences to actions. If you don't do this now, you can prepare yourself for visiting your child in jail every Sunday in the next few years.
- Do you know that children WANT rules? Yip. A child behaves better if they have rules to work from. They know where the boundaries are.
- Did you teach your child the meaning of the word NO? Well then that is your problem. Children should understand that when you say no to something, then you mean it. They should not ask you WHY either. They should know that you are the parent and that what you say is THE LAW to them.
I could go on ranting for hours, but I think that these are the basics to normal parenting. There will always be a variety of situations, and there will always be different scenarios but if we all stick to the same rules, then the case is halfway won. My children turned out just perfect! (Don't we all say that?)
You don't want your child to land up in jail one day, so do something about it NOW. Before it is too late. Stop being an OBEDIENT parent, and change your child into an OBEDIENT child. That is just the way it is supposed to be. (Needless to say, we ordered take-aways and had a picnic on the beach instead!)
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