It was a warm sunny morning in the Spring of 2015 and I was nearing the end of my walk near the Royal Botanical Gardens in Burlington Ontario.
The past few months had seen a series of unexpected personal and professional shake-ups and frankly I was a mess.
I remember the walk was unremarkable other than being beautiful. It wasn't too warm or too hot, quite a "Goldilocks" kind of day - just perfect.
Then it happened.
My legs buckled unexpectedly - catching me off guard. I grabbed a nearby post (luckily) and steadied myself. I tried to take another step and my legs gave out.
Butterflies?
I remember my chest felt strange, like a hundred butterflies trapped inside. There was no pain. It was surreal.
I waited for this "sensation" to pass. It eventually did and I walked (wobbled) back to my car and drove home wondering "wtf" had happened?
Because there was no pain I 'assumed' it wasn't serious.
Nuh-uh ... bad assumption.
A Blur of Bad News
Over the coming weeks I learned my heart was functioning improperly. Words like "80% blockage" and "right branch artery" and "cardiac ischemia" became commonplace conversation.
People started treating me differently. Dr's began acting as if I was made of glass.
The pills, the well-intentioned patronizing behaviour and the medical bracelet I wore was a daily reminder of how it feels to have a "heart condition."
Time To Test?
Over the next 2 years I was prodded, poked and pilled out while they ran me through a timed series of tests trying to figure out why I was experiencing issues ... all the while showing no markers for the problem.
It was a conundrum for sure.
But still they persisted with the pills and the advice about not over exerting myself, changing my diet, avoiding this and that and basically saying I should avoid anything stressful.
Um, life is stressful, specially when you're self employed.
I dialled things back. Travelled a bit.
Said goodbye to people I loved.
Started a new.
Waiting for the next test. Perhaps it would find something concrete.
Turns out patience truly is a virtue.
But Wait, There's More!
Recently, just before the August long weekend, I had a Cardiac CT.
Hours in the hospital. Drugs to slow my heart. Drugs to dilate my vessels and arteries (FYI ... nitro gives you a MASSIVE headache!) and finally the test.
The IV in my right arm was plugged into a pump in the testing room. The nurses try and comfort you and ensure you don't freak out. I was tired by this time.
They advise it's all automated. They tell you the automated pump will push saline through your veins and might feel "odd."
Seriously Hot Stuff!
They try and down-play the next part. The contrast media ... the "stuff" they use to create contrast for the x-rays when they slide you in and out of the huge donut shaped machine that spins and hums in a oddly comforting fashion.
The liquid is pushed rapidly into your vein and as it sweeps throughout your body, you feel like you're burning from the inside out. Your chest, your groin, your throat all heat up like nothing I've ever experienced before.
As soon as you think you can't take any more heat, it fades. The good news is the nitro induced headache was so bad I was distracted by the pounding pain in my face.
Dark Times and Dark Thoughts
I do remember thinking that a CT test (with the way they led me on the gurney and asked me to hold my arms and the automated IV pumps) was somewhat reminiscent of death by lethal injection!
I know ... but that's how my brain was working at the time.
4 hours after the test, just before the long weekend, I get a call from my cardiologist. "Mr Burchill, the test results are in ..."
Another "wtf?" moment ensued.
"Mr Burchill, we'd like to see you first thing next week."
How To Ruin a Long Weekend...
Oh great, just before a long weekend. Tell me (super quickly) that they want to see me. No reason why. You can guess where my mind went.
Uh-huh, bad news right?
Well it turns out that was not the case.
But that was a very long weekend!
"James, You're Unremarkable!"
This past week my cardiologist announced my heart was "unremarkable" and there is nothing wrong ... now.
They argued I ought to 'be safe' and stay on the assortment of heart meds they'd assigned me ... "just in case," but they also agreed there was no longer any reason to take them too.
So after more than 2 years of stress, drugs, tests, and not knowing ...
Now I Know
I'm heart healthy and free from any heart disease.
I've been thinking how to celebrate this good news and unless you've walked this path, you probably can't appreciate why I feel so grateful.
But I am. Very.
And here's what I'm going to do to show my gratitude.
All My Courses Free For a Week
I have a catalog of training programs within my online school. I teach a variety of things from making money as a social media manager, getting more things done with Evernote, compiling your ebook with Scrivener, learning about cryptocurrency and more.
There's a dozen different programs with a total list price upwards of $1200 (USD) so that's like C$1500!
And until 11:55PM EST on AUGUST 18th 2017 I am making ALL MY COURSES 100% FREE if you use the following code:
HEARTFREE
That's correct. I feel like I have been given a new lease on life (which I do) and I'd like to give something back, so all my online training programs are free until midnight next Friday.
Simply go to: http://courses.jamesburchill.com and take a look around. Remember to use code: HEARTFREE to get your 100% discount.
Thanks for reading, and I appreciate you.
Now go and take your pick of my programs ... or get them all, it's totally up to you.
James :-)
PS. #StayHealthy because ... you can't make a difference if you're dead!