Okay so.. My girlfriend and I have been together now for almost 4 years. we knew each other from high school.
We're the same age 27, and we have a lot in common. We where the type of couple that would anything together and use all of out time on each other. we're in love and we are in bliss. My girlfriend has cancer, she has Chronic leukaemia. Now she can live a long life on a pill that will hold her body in check. side effects are worse but she is brave and strong. we are really Lucky we live in Norway since the pills cost about 60.000 $ each month and here we get it more or less for free. Ive supported here through everything and she really is an inspiration.
Now..
We have had our ups and Downs like everyone else. we have been so happy for many years but now something is not right. See i know that at the start Things are more the Perfect and after a while Things start to get more on the normal side, but the love is still there more than ever.
Things started to get rocky when i was downseized at work, i went out to get a New job while as we where fighting the firm who fired me ( they didnt do anything by the book ) weeks with being turned Down for work became months and from there to years. i did all i could do get work. We had just bought our first house when this happend and we where trying to scrap us through it to keep the house. We had planned to have a child before all this mess happend and we decided to put it on hold.
We of course made one mistake and we got pregnant. Now this is and will always be a blessing for us no matter how Things was.
Things get better after the News that we will have a healty baby girl. We are so joyful and happy. and Things are really going great again. but now after she was born Things have been really hard. right before the birth of Aurora i got a job ( finally right ?) now i had to go to work again and not stay home like i had been doing. i managed to get some paid time of to be in the hospital when our baby arrived. again Things where Perfect.
now 8 weeks later we are in worse state than ever. she said she wanted to break Things of because she is tired. we cant communicate like we used to any more, now Things are really tough. one day Things can be great the next day can be hell. none of us know what we really want but again we want to make it work. so we hang in there, for us and the baby. I do as much as i can working from 07:00 and arent home before 18:00 then i will take the baby so my girlfriend can relax and get some sleep. after this i will go to sleep and then go to work again.
I know having a baby is a lot work and it will test the relationship to its breaking point. but honestly i dont know what my girlfriend is thinking and she wont tell me either. So i go home too her and my Family not knowing if we are together or if we are going to split up. this is the hard part and i am trying my best here. i love her and i hope she will really talk to me about all of this. but as of now the only thing i can do is to give my daughter all i have and think about how i will give her the best future possible for her.
sorry for the bad English , i havent slept in ages and are super stressed and tired.
thanks to everyone who reads, i will not be so depressing in the future!
