So I began working with a (stock) trading and investing coach this week.
Before our next meeting, she asked me to fill out several assessments of my personality and sent me Excel spreadsheets to use as trading templates.
I've been putting off really sitting down and working on them and when I finally knew I had to already, because I was avoiding it, I was surprised at the bunch of CRAP that came up!
Because stuff (feelings, emotions, pains) comes up when we do seemingly "normal" things that will actually contribute to us and what we're looking to achieve! Such as in this case, working with Excel spreadsheets, graphs, numbers and data, looking at financials, creating systems, etc.
And I thought it was so hilarious that I had SO much resistance to it that I had to share! And also share how I dissipated all that emotion and energy around it so I can proceed with more ease. So here it goes, my "raw" thoughts, feelings and emotions as I open the first of the spreadsheets and look at it:
"As I’m beginning to complete the questionnaires for Mandi, I notice a huge resistant to it. A spiral of avoiding it, eating to not be with it, not wanting to sit down and do it, resistance to the idea of focusing on it, i foresee pains in my body when sitting at my desk, the point of view that i have to “figure it out”, I have to “sit down and figure it out” and i don’t want to. But knowing I’m avoiding it, something, myself. Not wanting to look at it.
(tools used to dissipate and clear the energy above) interesting point of view i have all of those points of view! interesting point of view i have all those points of view! truth: are they mine? NO! (99% of our thoughts, feelings and emotions aren't even ours! we are just picking them up from others and buying them as true!) huge resistance to looking over financials and structure. structure = death
interesting point of view i have those points of view! interesting point of view i have the point of view that structure = death! HAHAHA! interesting point of view i have the point of view that spreadsheets are diminishing and limiting and evil and a square box and linear and awful!!!
interesting point of view i have those points of view! interesting point of view i have those points of view! how does it get any better than this? what else is possible i have never considered before? truth: is it mine? no! return all this stuff to senders with consciousness attached! it keeps me from having the brilliance of me! and what’s the value of that? small, bottled up. interesting point of view! how does it get any better than this? what else is possible now i have never considered or allowed myself to choose before?how does it get any better than this? what else can i choose that i haven’t been able to choose before?
What would it take for spreadsheets to be my friend?
i actually love and secretly enjoy the feeling of organization!
i just don’t like the upkeep. What would it take to upkeep with ease? automagically? as if by magic? what else is possible here?
truth: excel: do you wish to contribute to me? by god yes! mariana, yes!"
So, when we face our emotions and feelings head on and start to work with them...
We can actually start to dissipate and release the stuckness, the feeling bad, the awful avoidance feeling that can sometimes haunt us for YEARS!
I encourage you to look at what comes up for you and know that you can clear it, get past it and get freedom! There are simple tools available. In this case, I happen to be using the tools of Access Consciousness, which works with the energy of a situation and gives you tools to change anything in your life. Including your finances! I'm a trained facilitator of this work and I can honestly say it has changed my LIFE. How does it get any better than that?
Have a wonderful Friday!!!
Mariana