Have you ever heard that term? "Bacon and Beer" masculinity. I think I came up with it but who cares?
It is the dominant brand of masculinity in the west. You can observe it everywhere. From commercials to sitcoms to books to social media.
Hell, you can see it in your life. What am I talking about?
"Honey? Can I grab a few beers with the boys and watch the game tonight?"
Fuck me that's a horrendous question and I hope none of you ask it or answer it.
It encapsulates everything that's wrong with men these days. And considering the answer of the woman...
"Yes but promise me you'll be home early because tomorrow we have to go furniture shopping"
...it doesn't look good for women either.
OK, so "Bacon and Beer" masculinity is when people think that being a man is limited to drinking beer, watching sports, eating "manly" foods, having a beer, being "dumb", dressing a certain way etc.
Have you noticed that the last decade or so, this version of males have dominated our TVs?
The blocky, dumb husband that can't do shit unless the strong independent wife saves the day.
The problem is this was NEVER the case. Trying to normalize it obfuscates relationships. And subtly suggests a destructive social norm.
Masculinity is internal
Be wary when people use the sentence "A man is [insert statement]". It's usually part of propaganda to shame males.
The Yin side of the equation is as complex as the Yang. Watching cuck-sports and drinking estrogen beer is hardly a definitively masculine trait.
Creating
I had a "feminist" acquaintance trying to convince me that men aren't really all that great and it's our culture that glorifies male, because of patriarchy.
OK, this argument is so cliche I cringed when I responded. But the answer highlights a couple of important (for you, the dick grabbing man reading this)
Men create. We craft, paint, compose, write, fight, build. We do stuff. We create civilizations. You vegetating at your couch is blasphemy to your ancestors.
You are not a sports team. You are not a craft beer. You are not defined by what you consume.
You are defined by what you CREATE.
So stop being a caricature. Stop seeking permission from society.
Huh, another cliche I know... yet I am being super specific.
Pay attention. Notice the details. Notice when social norms try to limit you.
And when someone tells you to "man up" tell them to fuck off.
"A REAL man does this and this..."
Fuck off. Take your primitive wooden club and beat them up (metaphorically dumbass).
Masculinity means strength. Both mental and physical
-Thatredbeardguy
P.S- Oh hi Mark. Quick update. Remember when I told you I'll be writing a "thing"? Yeah, I am 4k words in so it's coming quite nicely. I'll distribute it to some people first for free to get a couple of testimonials so stay tuned, you may be one of the lucky ones