Ecstatic? Yeah!
Of course, living alone in a new place somewhere far has been my dream since my teenage years. I'm the kind of person who loves to do things on my own. It's not that I don't want to be with people but I just wanna be independent. Well, that has been my idea of being independent. On top of that, to work in Japan is one of my goals in life.
Image Source : Pixabay - Japan Osaka Night
December last year, a company from Japan hired me. They want me to go to Japan and work for them. I was really excited about it, that right after the interview - I called my mom and shared the best news I got that day. I told my close friends about it and they were all happy and excited for me. I asked my employer if it would be fine for me to go there maybe 3-4 months later as I have to clear out all my responsibilities from my then previous employer, and of course they were kind enough to agree.
Months have passed that ecstatic feeling is there, I was back then feeling demotivated with my previous job. I always think, oh just a little more bit of time and I'll be done with all of this. So days, weeks and months have passed. I only have two weeks left before I go to Japan. It was then, all started to sink in. I will be totally ALONE in Japan.
I realized all the things, the people that I have to left behind just so I could achieve and fulfill my dreams. I felt like I am selfish. I have to be away from my family, miles and miles away. I couldn't just go home anytime when there's a special occasion. My boyfriend, I will be leaving him behind. Right then, I started to feel sad. I'm going to miss lots of family occasions, reunions and such. I'm going to be away from the person whom I shared most of my time for the past three and half years. Aside from that, I am so afraid that that special person would feel lonely. I guess, it's really never easy.
To compensate those, I spent a lot of time with my family. My mom threw a party when I went home. She wanted me to feel so loved, that no matter what I do in life - she and dad will always support me. The only thing my parents wish me to do is just to be safe and to take extra good care of myself.
When I got back to Cebu, I spent most of time with my boyfriend. Sometimes on weekdays, I would eat lunch with him. After work, I would wait up for him and spend a little more time just talking and strolling. On weekends, we'd go on dates and we even went to the beach because he knows how much I love the beach. We made lots of good memories.
Aside from that, my boss for four years organized a lunch out on my last day at work. My team mates and friends, they all made me feel so loved.
And so the day came, a day before my scheduled departure date I already had to go to Manila to pick up and receive all my legal documents and attend the final orientation. It has started already, I started feeling lonely. Back at the hotel, I was crying - I missed everyone. I felt scared of what might happen to me there. I was so scared that the people that I left behind would be so lonely, I don't want them to be lonely.
When I arrived at Japan, it was really difficult. I couldn't speak Nihongo fluently and only few Japanese people could speak English. Aside from that, the location of my apartment is in residential area. Thus, it's really quiet in here that you could even hear your self breathing.
Good thing I have my Titas who are also working in foreign countries. They gave me tips how not to feel lonely. They tell me to go out more and just try to talk to people even if my Nihongo is still awful. At least that would make me feel like I'm not alone. Second is that I should not keep on thinking that I live far away, I should just think of the goals and the reasons why I came here and most importantly is to talk to God. Prayer is really powerful, it will keep you at peace and will make you feel safe.
Up to now, I still feel a bit sad but I'm really trying to be fine. I can do this!
To sum up, moving to a new place alone is really challenging. It could even be more difficult if there's a language barrier. But, this is just the beginning, I know better things are coming my way.
Thank you for reading my blog guys, see you around!
またね！
