For 6 damn years I've been silent... 6 years I was just waiting for the right moment to come so I can confess my feelings! And today was it!
Finally the right moment I was waiting for to get emotionally fucked :)
Long story short, we met 6 years ago, we're close friends, and I mean really really close!
For example, she can't get along with her day if I'm not okay, same goes for me.
I've had feelings at the beginning of our friendship, and yea these feelings started to grow stronger day by day... I didn't say anything, I was waiting for the right time to confess, the right time when I'm mentally/financially ready so I can be able to not mess it up!
She gave me hints a lot of times, I always thought (Nah, she's just being nice)
Oh, how stupid and dumb I was!!
Today, she called, we talked and had some laughs. it was lovely, I was on my calming pills so I felt ready to say something! Take it off your chest you coward, I said to myself. Nah, let's just ease it out with some jokes and laughs... She said I need an advice from you, I said sure go ahead what's up?
She said we've a problem, me and boyfriend and I don't know what to do... I said, umm, what boyfriend? You didn't tell me you had a boyfriend?... She kept swearing that she told me before, but I'm pretty sure she didn't.
And they were together for 6 months! And I didn't know like WTF?
Classic shit, isn't? But you know what's not so classic? I gave her some ideas to fix her problems with him. She thought that it'd help and thanked me for always being there :)
In fact, what I told her to do, is actually gonna mess it up between them even more!
And that's something I'm not so proud of, I wish I didn't do that but fuck it I wasn't thinking straight. I hope things goes well for them though.
Dumbass... Waited too damn long for the right moment to come, huh? :)
You know what, fuck this, I don't want things to go well for them 😞
Man, I don't know, I feel evil and that's not me but I can't fight it!
It's my damn fault though! Who the fuck waits for 6 years or even a year to just say something or at least give a hint?! ... 😞
Thing is, I never though I'd get heart-broken again. It happened once and here we go, fucking hate this, feels so dark and heavy... World's so gray for me right now. You know that shitty feeling?
Well, it's not gonna last... Guess I'll be fine after a while, maybe?
There's something that's a bit weird and funny, I've been listening to this song below for a couple of days now :) Coincidence?
bülow - You & Jennifer (Audio)
Guess I'm done now lol... Enjoy the song :)