Like many Indian guys, I have also grown up not knowing much about menstruation.
That was all that was there in my 10th standard textbook.
So the lining slowly breaks and comes out through the vagina as blood and mucous. This takes places every month and it is known as menstruation. It usually lasts for about two to eight days.
Later during college, all thanks to the blogs and celebrity-interviews, I came to know about mood-swings during cycles.
Then I met this friend online. We used to chat regularly about various things. She used to be so open about periods. She was the first girl to talk things like..
‘No, I cancelled the temple visit today. Periods.’
‘Thank you for this. I was actually PMSing and feeling low, it brightened my mood’
'I didn’t do it purposely. I have severe mood swings during cycles…’
This led me to read about Premenstrual syndrome (PMS), physical and mental stress during periods and the mood swings. Some of the experiences were scary and shocking.
Like in one blog, a girl wrote that there was too much pain, despair and mood swings that she used to do meaningless crying for no reason to vent that out. Then there was a video with a girl facing the ceiling with open eyes (somewhat dead-look) and tears streaming down.
I have seen guys say to girls 'Why are you so moody? Why you keep your face like that.. it’s irritating' etc. I have seen guys taking every harsh behavior of girl seriously and hurting her or paying back for it later. It made me feel sad that this issue of women was taken for granted. Not many understood their pain or the mood swings during the cycles.
Later I told her all this and thanked her for being open about it. I told her that it made me understand women better.
And then she only told me this: It’s fine..no need to thank me. When you have fever, don’t you tell me. It’s the same thing for me. I am not one of those who finds it weird or shameful.
I wish every human sees it this way. I don’t see any point in hiding it or being shameful about it or using fancy terms like ‘chums’ and ‘ladies issues’. It is a common biological thing. And the men also need to understand it in depth to treat women better.
I really wish they start this in schools, dedicating a chapter for it just to bring it in casual discussions.
Change starts only when the society views menstruation as something very basic and natural, like fever or a cut on hand.
One of those sad quotes I have read - “Menstruation is the only blood that is not born from violence, yet it's the one that disgusts everyone the most”