I obviously have a big head particularly a big chin or the part of my head below my eyes. Not only that, the backbone collapsed so it made my neck sunk down to my chest area so the combination just gave me inability to directly look down. So I have to turn my head for me to be able to look what is down but partially.
So when for example washing my hands or some dishes I cannot comfortably see on what is in front of me. That is why it contributes to my plans of cooking because it is just impossible to watch or look into what I am doing and it gets more dangerous too since it involves handling sharp knives or hot pots and pans.
My head also is heavy and I can feel it so you can see me while walking with my head tilted. Add to that my difficulty in breathing and inching strides when I have some pain so I look like a zombie that looks like a Frankenstein, it is just terrible. My young nephew just is terrified when seeing me even while I am just sitting on my seat.
It is the disability that comes with my big head that is bothering me and not my appearance because I do not care anymore how other people thinks about my appearance which I could completely cope with as a surgical mask can make me invisible if not unnoticeable.
But not being able to talk comfortably or eat with other people is just too much of a burden to carry plus the pain that quite makes me to forget the plans that I want to do makes it absolutely a hard life for me or even to think about it all is a mental stress.