Identity is most commonly assosiated with either of two traits:
i) Ego; or
ii) Consiousness
Let me briefly discuss exactly what these two mean:
Ego
Ego is the part of your brain that understands the concept of time. It is the analytical part concerned with remembering the past and creating expectations or predictions for the future. In a sense, the ego concerns itself with the non-ethereal, with where the present instant fits in into a larger life history and future.
The simplest way to distinguish the ego from non-ego consious process is looking for verbal processes. Almost all "thoughts" in your brain that are composed of words are manifestations of ego-centric thought processes.
All words are inherently generalisations. We use a dictonary of a hundred thousand words to describe many billions of unique objects in the universe. We can do this by generalising and classifying items based on similarities and commonalities (based on past experience). Think about any two random words, say "strawberry cupcake". Each of those two describe a certain feature of the item in question, strawberry describing the flavour (and perhaps color), whilst cupcake classifies the item based on shape and texture.
Thus, all verbal processes are essentially generalisations based on past experience to help us simplfy and understand what we percieve. Since they depend on memory, they are the primary tool of the Ego.
It is important to note that the ego by itself is neither good or bad, but it is shaped by the life history of the individual. Further, as we shall see later, ego makes for an excellent servant but a poor master.
An example of a highly egoistical state would be that of depression or mania - two situations where your perception of yourself becomes all but unlinked to the world around you, and instead depends almost entirely on your thoughts.
Consiousness
The part of your experience (qualia) that is independent of any memory of the past or expectation of the future can be described as consiousness. This is the second place where "you" may reside. In contrast with ego, consious experience exists exclusively in the present. It consists of the cumulative sensory input recieved by you at any given moment, and any feelings experienced by you as a result. Consious experience is eventually filtered down to the ego, where labels (words) are attached to it to simplify it and store it in memory.
While the ego can have repetitive thoughts due to generalisation, no two moments of your life are identical from a consiousness perspective. The uniqueness of each moment and the sensory imprint generated by it is lost somewhere in translation to memory, which functions based on commonalities and connections.
Examples of highly consious states include - the “flow” state, when you’re completely absorbed in an activity (could be a sport, playing an instrument, etc.) to the point of being temporarily egoless. Your entire mental faculties are taken up by the task of percieving and experiencing the activity in the moment than thinking about any other point in time, either past or future.
So which one is "you"?
Well, that's a trick question. The only accurate answer would be neither. To understand this better, picture yourself as a security guard with two screens displaying CCTV footage constantly in front of you.
You can choose to look at both alternatively, or focus on either one most of your life. The content of both screens is interlinked but unique.
Thus, “reality” for most people is simply the point of intersection between perception and expectation. In other words, what we call “real” is basically what both our consious experience and our ego agrees to be real. This explains the efficacy of the placebo effect too - if reality was solely based on perception, expectation would not alter the result (but it does).
Further, major events on either screen are likely to draw your attention. A sudden sharp pain quickly shifts you to a consiousness mindset where you just experience the pain and react instinctively, before switching back to the ego state and verbalising what just happened. Similarly, if you have a very sinificant worry about the future, it can make it hard to live in the moment, as you constantly keep shifting to an ego centric state.
In the next part, I will discuss how you can use this knowledge to your advantage - by voluntarily choosing the best mind state for any given situation. I will also discuss how lack of awareness about the same has led to mordern society living lives almost exclusively inhabiting their ego, and how that is the cause of dissatisfaction, depression and loss of purpose so common today.
In the meanwhile, I would love to hear your questions, or critique especially regarding any consious
state that you feel cannot be cassified as one of the two states described above, or the consequences of such classification.
Till next time.