I personally like both versions - leaning toward the first version.
It is easy to suggest that this be revisited - but Steemit is such that I would strongly recommend that you do 'not' revisit it here but in a future post :c)
The contrasts are stark - but I do feel that a little bias against 'him' is felt. Even if he is indeed a villain, there is surely a more graceful way to present it. :c)
For some reason I felt inclined to give it a stab but I quickly ran out of steem. ;c)
"Two hearts - One encased within a hunk of rock, another adorned with a grain of sand."
Well done as always.
RE: A Song of Her and Him