I believe that a person's character cannot be found, developed I suppose I mean, without that person first having experienced difficulties, hardship and adversities, suffering and even pain or grief. The good times, while enjoyable, don't force us to learn much, to strive or struggle our way forward; it's the troubles people face that us move towards a different and hopefully better iteration of ourselves and as a person moves through that process character is built.
Human beings can be extremely strong emotionally and mentally, some have a spirit that seems almost unbreakable; but that doesn't come cheaply and never for free. It's earned.
I like to think I'm a strong person and I know why; adversity, hardship, loss, grief and many other reasons. My guy is strong also, sometimes I think he's unbreakable because the weight he carries, the burdens, and how he stands tall despite them makes me think he could never break; but I've seen it. He's human.
My man is fond of a saying that comes from a notable historical figure; it speaks about true strength not being solely a physical thing, rather that it comes from a person's will, their mind. It's determination, perseverance, standing up when we fall and the doggedness to apply effort over and over again; indomitable will.
Something happened this week and I watched my guy's shoulders slump, something that rarely happens. It knocked him down and it broke my heart seeing how difficult it was for him and that I felt so helpless. I wanted to take it away from him but was unable and so I simply supported him by being there and letting him know that I was and would be no matter what.
What prompted this post was the stages he went through, watching how he found his way back, rebuilt himself, and simply refused to break. He bent, worryingly so, but he did not break. His character, forged in the crucible of hardship and adversity, would not permit it and for that I'm thankful because he's too good a man to fall.