Valentine is like every other day to me. The only memories I have of this day is being unpleasantly oppressed by couples who take to social media to show off their sweet, sweet love.
And it is not like I mind one bit. In fact, I love Love, so I enjoy watching others enjoy it but I used to firmly believe that it was not for me and that I would never fall in love. Honestly, only time will tell that bit.
Memories from the past would be telling myself that what happens on social media wasn’t always real and that love was beautiful but not exaggerated. I think there was only one time that valentine was a day to look forward to from my end and that would be when I prepared a little something for my mother.
The meaning every person ascribes to this day has to be very different. I can remember sometime last year, after making yet another wrong turn on the road of romance, I loathed valentine with a passion that was not common. What made me get through it was not that I forgot but because there was a memory far greater than the ones, I made with some … (I better not cuss).
I have a love-hate relationship with memories. I love them and yet they make me want to run into a wall out of embarrassment sometimes. Happen to anyone else? If one memory doesn’t make me go “ahhhh fvck” another would make me go “oh my goodness, why did I do that?”
So, the case with this one is, “OH MY GOD! HOW STUPID CAN I BE?” but then I smile afterwards because I can be petty.
Valentine last year, I was with someone and quite alright, before the whole ring of the love bell in the love week, I was getting something ready for someone as well. My mother.
Maybe it was a subconscious part of me but I just couldn’t bring myself to get him anything. There was this cold feeling I’d get and maybe I just wanted to be blind to the red flags but they were there and I the most reasonable part of my brain refused to ignore.
I did however, purchase a pretty green dress from his family store because I thought it would look beautiful on my mother (I am cringing even now as I write this…memories – shudder).
And then I made a few calls to get a cake and a rose flower if possible. The latter wasn’t possible so I just settled for the cake and the dress. I even wrote about it during a contest last year – here on Hive. Turned out my instincts were hitting on something because I crafted the play from my point of view in which I got a gift from someone and what do you know…
He (not my ex but someone who wanted to be part of my life) sent me a message asking how I knew.
“Knew what?” came my reply
Then came his ramble of how much of a witch I am sometimes because I just seem to know. Honestly, I was expecting nothing. I just wanted to live in a dream (through fiction) for a moment.
Around 12am, he came to my house and handed me a wrapped gift that just had to be a portrait. I felt it. And it was. The most beautiful drawn portrait of me anyone had ever done.
Image is Mine
These memories overrode what I had remembered and so I don’t remember it much anymore. Even if I do, it’s only for a second before I smile because something sweeter pops up – my mother’s surprise turned shock, then the happiness and then the blessings she rendered on me. That would be followed quickly by a huge smile on my face thanks to a certain someone who gifted me a portrait.
So, these are the sweetest memories I have of Valentine. I wanted to make some new ones this year but well, life happens and I have so much responsibilities at home and at work. The only thing I can get Mother this year would be a cupcake.
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