"What's the point," he said in respect of following a precise and established set of guidelines and procedures, "no one will know I didn't follow all the steps."
It was said with such conviction...and I wanted to slap that mofo so fucken hard!
He was right of course, no one would know...but he would.
I'll not go into details, but that conversation made me think about something I often say about doing the right thing and doing what's right, even when no one is looking; I see it as a strong indicator of one's quality and integrity as a person and I believe it to be a solid ethos and ideal to uphold.
People talk about doing the right things, being a good person, and many people do it publicly...but what about when no one is watching?
I recently (unfortunately) had some contact with a Hive user who went to great length to promote and champion his charitable endeavours and donations, such that they were. I was unimpressed but ok, I'll give it the benefit of the doubt, the person has shown some charitable generosity...allegedly. It made me feel somewhat dubious though, suspicious of the true purpose and reason behind said charity, if it even happened. What I wondered was why the person felt the need to toot his own trumpet, herald to the world whomever read the comment about the alleged charitable act.
Is it not still charity if no one knows about it?
Is not the feeling of being a kind and generous person the same if it's done without anyone else knowing its been done?
Well yeah, of course it's the same...so why promote the fact? For the feeling of validation, relevance, importance, ego and hubris and so on - that's why.
That's just an example...the alleged act of kindness or generosity is the same whether others know it has been done or not, whether anyone is watching. So back to my thoughts. I don't believe any person on the planet, one hundred percent of the time and for their entire life, has done the right thing in front of others or when others are not looking. Human beings are not that perfect and never will be. But, we can strive towards it, take actions that lean towards that ethos and, if done enough of the time, habits form and those habits keep happening subconsciously; if a bad habit then bad...but if a good habit then, great right? The chap I mentioned at the start, the what's the point guy...I talked to him about what he'd said and the thought behind it, asked some questions about who he sees when he looks in the mirror, how he sees himself and how he wants others to see or perceive him. Understandably, he saw someone valid and valuable and wanted others to see the same...and then I said, and that's the fucken point you nutbag, you'll see if you do the wrong thing and that counts! (I didn't call him a nutbag but wanted to.) If we work to continually improve, work hard all the time towards better outcomes, doing the right thing, we're going to accept, value and even like as a person who we are which leads others to do the same usually; it's a personal integrity thing. Doing the right thing when no one is looking, being diligent, responsible, disciplined, taking ownership of ourselves including thoughts and attitudes, is a very simple way to build self-confidence and self-respect and create a platform upon which to build other attributes, layers of value...and that's why doing the right thing when no one is looking, especially when no one is looking, is so important to me personally. I think he got it, time will tell. I wonder about you guys and gals though, your thoughts on doing the right thing and how doing so all the time, publicly and privately I mean, could affect your lives positively. Do you have examples of when you've done, or not done, it that have had positive or adverse effects? Do you think having that ace up your sleeve, self-respect and personal integrity, can help promote better attitudes, feelings and outcomes? Do you think I've got no fucken idea at all? Feel free to comment below if you've got anything to say, I'll respond. Design and create your ideal life, tomorrow isn't promised - galenkp [Original and AI free]
The image in this post is my own - it's a marlinspike; a military mate of mine, (Airforce, don't hold it against him), made for me. Marlinspike's are used in marine ropework, to tighten and loosen strands of rope or cable, among other things...and as a self-defence weapon which is why I have them. This one lives in my Land Cruiser four wheel drive ready to go to work should the need arise.