As the clump of hair rips from my head, I realize how buzzed I must be. I hear it, but it has almost no sensation. "OOOOOOOOOHHHH!" the dishwashing boys call from behind us, useless twits.
It's 3am on January 1st, and we are pushing some very intoxicated patrons out of the door. By we, I mean two pissed off chefs, and all the male servers. I jumped in because they weren't winning fast enough, there were women instigating, and I was ready to be free.
As I watch the fistful of my turquoise mane get shoved out into the street, along with its new wasted owner, I can't help but to laugh. I was probably more than drunk too, and it had been an awfully long night. At last, the door is closed and locked.
This was my life for over a decade. Each New Year's Eve, we made the night happen. My restaurant people know what I mean; it's part of this overlap where a job becomes a lifestyle. You see your coworkers on more holidays than your family, because that's where the money is.
Of course, those are also the days customers act the worst. Holidays bring unhappy people out to the bars in flocks, and who do you think they share that spark with? The people who handle their food, bold move there.
On this particular night, we had pulled off a 4-course service for 200+ people, with a total staff of 10. Four in back, six in the front. We weren't understaffed in the kitchen, you just couldn't fit another body back there, the line was a danger alley!
"Hey dummy, Salmon is 86'd, remember?"
4 top— A table of four.
Mary took the appetizer for her 4 top out.
Behind!— You better watch out bud!
"Behind!" Joe shouted, as he rushed past with a stack of 200 degree pans.
There was the NYE that I watched a man urinate directly on a cop who tried to kick him out, or the one where I found a lady asleep in the staff bathroom (to this day, I still wonder how she even got in there!)... THIS New Year's Eve though, this one stands out as the craziest.
It started pretty early on in the day, my shift began at noon. We didn't open our doors for the first reservation until 4pm, but we needed every bit of prep time! Fine dining involves a multitude of planning to flow smoothly, especially at a high volume of buisness!
Since we were turning and burning tables this evening, that meant polishing extra stemware. I cannot explain how absolutely impossible it is to wash and polish stemware in a hurry if you've never done it. It is to be avoided at all costs if efficiency is a priority!
By 12:30, we had already taken our first shot of the night. Tables were moved, stations were over-stocked with items we knew would disappear quickly, like side plates. Items one puts in small baggies were shared, as the six of us carried out the labor of a team 3x our size.
That's not a complaint, we picked it actually. We could work hard, or hire extra servers for the night. Do you think we were sharing our money with someone who didn't even know the ropes around our joint? Heck no! Front of house is a den of lions, if you know you know.
The restaurant was seriously tiny, on the average day, the floor was laid out to seat about 45 people. We upped that to around 80 by 4pm, it was a masterpiece of planning, with a heck of a kicker. It was all staged to be moved quickly at 10pm, so the main dining room could become a dance floor!
Turn and Burn— Get Guests in and out as quickly as possible. $$$
"That new server sucks at turning and burning 'em. She'll never make money."
Corner!— Mind the doorway/ corner.
"Corner!" Jen yelled, balancing a full tray of drinks, as she exited the server well.
It has been several years since the wildest New Year's Eve I've ever worked, but a few details stand out to me in the mist of aging memories:
1. The first person to get sick was this huge guy. It was maybe 5pm, and he needed an ambulance!
2. A man proposed to his girlfriend, and she stormed out. He sat and ate the rest of his meal calmly; people sent him shots. It was totally bizarre.
3. Around 7pm, a man tried to kiss me. I said something that made their 6 top bust out laughing, and he stood to smooch me. I have no idea why, but I dodged it, and they tipped me a lot.
4. At the end of the night, a bunch of people from down the street came in, and started drama with the other guests. This continued until bar close, when we had to physically force them out, while two women threw hands about it. RIP my hair 🤣.
5. I have never worked so efficiently with a team before, the amount of business we handled was unreal! Total, it was a roughly 17-hour shift. We had sparse send backs.
I was chatting with a friend earlier, and I realized I've never actually gone out on New Year's Eve. The holidays of my 20's were all nights like that; a blur of drunk faces and odd interactions. Busy hands, a strategic mind, and sore feet. That's service industry life!
At midnight, I'd toast my coworkers, and we'd watch everyone else kiss. Our voices joining in with theirs as they pulled apart to shout, "Happy New Year!" with us.
That image is fairly similar to what our kitchen looked like that evening. The dishwashers made salads and desserts during the bulk of business, and servers bussed and stacked the dishes. Small places are like that, you bus your own tables, and then sometimes run the dishes through too.
Overall, it was one of the more intense jobs I've had, and it was by far the most lucrative! That night I made a wad of cash, if only I had done something cool with it. No, I started my new year like a goob.
I drank cava until my feet stopped hurting, and when all the guests were gone, I switched to liquor. It was a very chill job in that department. We were a hedonistic force to be reckoned with, and booze was on the house. Even drunk, we were a precise crew.
For that year, I was happy to start off by cleaning until five am. Belting out silly songs with my co-workers, as we got just as wasted as the folks we'd booted. I went to bed at 8am, and woke up sometime after 2, giggling as I went to get an asymmetrical haircut.
I don't think I was aware how much I was learning about life then; I was in my early 20's, and just wanted to do. Working in restaurants made me process so many things about people... but on that frosty night, I was just glad I had made it through another NYE shift!
I hope you got a kick out of my most bizarre New Year's Eve in the service industry! Are you a current or ex restaurant employee? I'd love to hear about one of your memorable nights below 😁!