It all starts with a burn in the eyes, pulsating light and a staccato sounds rattling my eardrums. Each morning, my impulse is to reach over and stop the alarm on my phone, quickly reminding myself that I'm doing this all for my family. I don't have the luxury of waiting for the sun to warm my face. No, I have to crush the cold carpet with my crusty corn-covered feet.
Though yesterday morning has hard, my morning routine was broken. I got a text that I would be getting a package in the mail. This was great news! It made my day delightful and filled me with anticipation for today.
I have many jobs. The one I work on for over forty hours a week is the one that pays the bills, but my job entertaining the world afterward is the one I live for. My wife calls it a hobby, but I make money doing it, so I can call it a business...or anything I want! As an entertainer, I ordered the brand new Greznko Selfie Articulating Gimbal Mount 2300 (GSAGM 2300). It wasn't cheap and I had to hide the purchase from my lovely so I wouldn't get yelled at later, but it would all be worth it! I hate cameramen, and now I could fire them all! I could wear this anywhere I wanted and it would shoot me from the best angles. Well...today...it came in!
A high pitched ding followed by a low pitch dong shook me from my slouching mental slumber at the keyboard. My mind raced to think of who it could be and I knew in an instant it was my GSAGM 2300! I went to the door as quickly as I could, slipping and sliding across the hardwood floor, knocking over a dirty cereal bowl my daughter had cleverly left on the edge of the counter. It crashed on the floor sending Fruity Pebbles and warm, stagnant milk splashing all over the floor and cabinetry, mixing milk within the shards of the green, ceramic bowl. It's amazing what your mind sees and ignores in an instant. I paid no mind to the mess other than to grumble a moment as I quickly made it to the door.
I had been fooled. It was a box of food my wife had ordered so she wouldn't have to spend so much time preparing our daily meals.
Ugggh!
Now I had a huge mess to clean up.
"HELLLLLLLGA!!!!" I cried out my daughter's name to clean up the mess. Sure, I had made it, but if she had put her bowl away where it belonged in the dishwasher, I would have never hit it.
I got another text, "Your package has arrived." One problem. The text was from Grenko. I did not have my GSAGM 2300! I frantically called.
"I'm sorry, sir" he said in a nasally, annoyed voice.
"Yes, dad?" Helga said to me as I was now on the phone.
I pointed toward the mess with a straight arm a mile long, looking sternly the opposite direction to focus on the phone call.
"Look, I have not received the..."
"Sir, I recognize your phone number. We have an order for you that says your package has not arrived yet."
"But I have a text here that says it has arrived but it's not here!"
"I'm so sorry, sir. That text should have said it will arrive tomorrow."
"No!" grrr... "That's what I got yesterday."
"I'm so sorry, sir. We must have sent you the wrong message."
"So when will I get my package."
"I'm so sorry, sir. I show someone will be there tomorrow."
A ding dong hit my precious ears again. I saw a silhouette at the door.
Opening it quickly, with mouth agape, there was my package.
"This is for you?" said the man at the door.
"YESSS!" I screamed like a little Helga. I said something pretty disrespectful under my breath in the phone before hanging up. What a range of emotions!
The door man thought he was handing it to me, but I grabbed it so fast, he couldn't think. He just stood there arms empty with a surprised look and hair flung forward from the pull of the package. Gotta love physics...
I opened the package and there it was! My videos will never be the same.
"Dad, can you help me?" I heard in the background, but my brain was tied to the box and my ears jumbled her words as I sank into my world of wonder.
This story was inspired by the prompt from the Ink Well community. I hope you enjoyed it. @theinkwell/the-ink-well-prompt-54-plus-weekly-challenge-and-prize-announcement
All images are in the public domain and can be found on http://unsplash.com