Overthinking can be exhausting, disturbing, and frustrating because it creates scenarios that don’t exist and fills the mind with worries that may never come to pass. On the other hand, it can also make you more cautious and help you recognize red flags, especially in relationships. Hahaha! I mentioned relationships, and I laughed, but that’s not the aspect I’m talking about today.
Have you ever been kind to someone, only to be repaid with betrayal? Have you ever found yourself questioning whether being kind and sympathetic was a mistake?
MY STORY
It all started with what I thought was a simple and harmless decision. One afternoon, a friend called and asked for financial help, explaining his situation. Without hesitation, I decided to assist him because he promised to repay the money in two days. The painful part? The money I used to help him wasn’t even mine. It belonged to a group that had entrusted me with it. I explained this to him clearly, letting him know that the group might request their money within a week. Despite this, I chose to help him because I trusted him, we had been friends for a long time.
Two days passed, and he didn’t return the money. A week later, I called to ask for it, but his excuse was not reasonable. Still, I tried to understand. However, as the second week approached, the group sent me a message informing me that they would need their money the following week. Unfortunately, my friend started avoiding me. He wouldn’t pick up my calls and even acted like he didn’t see me whenever our paths crossed in school. In the end, I had to find another source to repay the group’s money.
Since I am not the type to keep begging someone for what belongs to me, I started questioning everything. Was I foolish to trust him? Am I too kind, and that’s why people take me for granted? Does he think I am weak, or that I don’t know how to react? My mind kept racing with different thoughts. I even considered involving the authorities, but would I end up spending more than I was owed? I was drowning in deep thoughts.
The two days he promised turned into weeks, then months, and eventually years. Today, it has been over three years without a refund. I stopped asking him for the money, and life has moved on. But sometimes, I wonder, does he think I have forgotten about it? Or does he believe he was smart enough to outwit me?
That experience changed me. It made me overthink everything. Every reaction, every decision felt like a potential trap. I began analyzing every word people said, searching for hidden meanings. I became more cautious, paid closer attention to details, and set boundaries immediately whenever I sensed any act of betrayal.
Nowadays, I still offer help, but only when my spirit truly agrees with it, and only with what I can afford to lose. I no longer let emotions cloud my judgment or influence my decisions. That experience reshaped the way I see the world.
Life has a way of shaping us, sometimes in ways we never expect. If you had told me years ago that I would become an overthinker, I would have laughed it off. But one experience changed me, rewiring my mind to analyze every possibility, every outcome, and every unspoken word.
Thanks for reading, I am @nsigo1