How relationship help us to cope with trauma
Trauma is a difficult experience that can leave a lasting impact on someone's mental health, it's like a wound that takes a long time to heal, it sometimes leaves a scar
It's an experience that leaves us feeling shattered, lost and alone
Even in the midst of such darkness, there's always a hope and that hope is found in a relationship, it's maybe family, friend, or even a romantic partner
Having someone to lean on can make a difference in the journey to healing
Years back, I remember very well about an experience that happened to my sister which led to a serious trauma in her life, my sister and her boyfriend were preparing for their wedding when a brief sickness took her fiance's life away, trust me when I say things were not easy for her, she could not imagine a life without him, she felt it was an empty world to live in all alone,
yes twas not my fiance buh I felt it, cause this man was someone I was very close to, if the death of my sister's fiance could weigh me down, imagine the life of my sister, I know that was not the end of life, but all those thoughts came afterwards
As she went through those pains and heartbreak caused by death, I was at her side every step of the way, I do almost everything for her, there were times she will cry off, I would let her cry, so she can feel better, I would be there to listen to her stories, offering her comfort and validating her feelings, at a point it was not easy for us, I even suggested a therapist for her buh it didn't work.
Along the line, she started to accept the fate, she accepted everything life offers her with faith
She began to feel better as days passed, there were days she will feel like pouring out the tears and the talks, it was normal, buh then again we had to always be there for her cause things weren't easy,
Planing for marriage and then you lost your partner, it's a whole lot
Why am I sharing this story, all for the power of relationship, we see how relationship helps in making my sister cope with trauma,
Having someone to lean on can make a lot of difference in our journey towards healing
Relationships can provide us with a sense of safety and security, which is important for healing from trauma. There are people who only feel better when they get people who listen to them, so they can pour everything to them and give them advice to cope with situation and make them feel better
They can offer emotional support and sense of connections.
Of course relationship can also be complex and challenging, especially in the context of trauma. Trust issues, emotional triggers and conflict needs can create misunderstanding in a relationship
I use to learn something from Apostle Joshua Selma, that we should not through away relationships with value, that the gift of men is the greatest gift one can have in life,
So if you're lucky to have honest people who can stand by you no matter the situation, do not let them go,
he used to say we should swallow our pride and keep them cause such people are rare to find.
I believe that with being patience, understanding and willingness to work through challenges together, relationships can be a powerful source of healing and growth.
They can help us develop resilience, rebuild our sense of self, and discover new meaning and purpose in life
Coleman Barks' in his translation of Rumi's work once said " The wound is the place where the light enters you"
Relationships can be the light that enters our wound, helping us to heal, grow and find new life in the midst of chaos
Thanks for reading 😊