Sometimes i am not to anyone because I also need me, I also need to listen to me, mending my broken spaces, filing my sharp corners...
Therefore, if I do not answer the messages or if I put my phone in silence for a few hours or a few days, it does not mean that I have closed doors to the world, I have only gone for a walk with myself, with that someone who had been carelessly neglected.
It's funny how, almost without realizing it, we end up leaving ourselves in the "spam" tray. We relegated to the drawer of pending issues, to the last page of our agenda or to that yellow phosphorescent post-it ends up getting lost in the natural bustle of our desk because there is always a priority that advances it and postpones it.
Is exactly like Benjamin Franklin said:
"There are three extremely hard things: steel, diamonds and knowing oneself"
We live in a tremendously demanding and competitive society, and sure we know it. There are many things to do, and the days can sometimes be as hectic as they are exhausting. As if that were not enough, the new communication systems are added to it, where the treatment and interactions are constant and immediate.
We live organized in different groups of WhatsApp, we are always reachable and on the screens of our mobile there is always a message to answer, mail to attend, photos to put a like and a label to respond even if we do not want.
It's like living in an epicenter where our hyperopic gaze is unable to see what is closest. Our tired eyes can read the needs of others but are unable to decipher their own ... Everything seems blurred, everything has become a ball that is stuck there, in our hearts and our minds as if something were wrong, as if something was not right and we did not know what it is ...
You've reached the limit and you still do not know.
You are needed for many people, you know. Every day you have ten mountains to climb and dozens of obstacles to overcome, and you get there, there is no doubt. However, nobody gives you medals for it, almost no one recognizes your efforts, your dedication or even everything you get to give up for those around you. Little by little, things lose their meaning and people taste. The world no longer has music, it no longer rhymes, it is no longer agile, and you end up sinking in your own responsibilities like the stone that falls into a bottomless pit.
To be for everyone and for everything every day and every moment, has a secretly high interest rate. The signs of this process of stress continued over time can very easily lead to depression, therefore, we must be very attentive to the symptoms:
*Fatigue, an extreme tiredness that sometimes does not recover with sleep or night rest.
*Headaches, migraines.
*Back pain.
*Bad digestions
*Sensation of constant boredom, life loses
almost all our interest.
*Impatience and irritability.
*Frustration, comments full of cynicism, bad mood, constant apathy ...
But curiously enough, living in a hyper-stimulated and hyper-demanding environment ends up narcortising us. We become insensible to our own needs, foreigners of our own heart and vagabonds lost in that island of Circe where one has completely forgotten where their home is, where that house where one's own being dwells.
So...today I'm not for anyone, today I need me.
Saying out loud "these days I'm not for anyone, I need myself" is not a lack of respect. No harm is done to anyone, nothing is neglected, the world will continue to turn and the rivers will flow. However, something wonderful will happen: we will give way to emotional healing, we will give time, attention and a space to shelter ourselves.
It will be like entering the hollow of a tree to make contact with our roots, where we find ourselves almost in a fetal position, to nourish ourselves and allow our leaves, our branches, to grow tall and more free to touch the sky.
Finally... as Jean Paul Sartre said:
"We only become what we are from the total and profound rejection of what others have done to us"
Take the control.
