In living with a human ego it's quite complicated to reign it in at times. As we all know, sometimes our "head" can get the best of us, relentlessly haunting our inner peace with exaggerated and often unfactual projections about bad potential developments in the future.
Fear.
Fear is a poor attempt of the ego to protect us and warn us of the things it can imagine on its slim horizon. But the more we listen the more we get sucked into a world of doubt, fear and ultimately: self-sabotage. Instability within us can make the most mundane things seem dangerous and potentially life-threatening, especially the longer we dwell on them. Even if the occassion to think about them was something we deem worthy of our attention.
Are we destined to get trumped by our own ego's inability to see the big picture? Are we to succumb to inaction and stagnation out of becoming convinced by the ego's fits?
Nope. Fortunately we don't.
But how do we get back to center and how can we help let go of the overidentification with the ego's worst projections?
Some have advised to "just focus on something else." Well, whoopdidoo, it is certainly great advice if it was achievable. But by definition, obsessive thinking about fear narratives pretty much rules out the ability to focus on something else, precisely because it always returns with such brute force.
The solution is similar though far more workable in reality.
What you have to do is swap your focus onto something else by shifting the emphasis of your future projections on an event you can get happy about.
Let's say something worries you to no end, for many people this would be something like, say, asking their boss for a raise. Not that you don't deserve it, but it's a steep template for the ego to run wild with the most far out fears and concerns. "What if he laughs at me and I have to live through negative repercussions in the office?" "What if he fires me on the spot for the audacity to ask for more money?" "What if he says yes and I get overwhelmed with too many demands in a higher position I'm not cut out for?"
Well, I'm sure there is a reason you had the idea to begin with, to ask for that raise, but instead of focussing on its benefits this appointment becomes a dreaded future event the more we think about what it will mean for our life longterm.
A better example might be to leave a longterm relationship because it's just not working out. Many people out there would love to do just that but are too afraid what might happen if they do. So they don't, even if they have been wanting to for years or even decades!
Now, instead of postponing the appointment forever and instead of focussing on the good sides of it... what if you focussed on what you are going to do after that dreaded conversation?
Like going out to eat the best pizza you can find in your town with a good friend. Regardless of how the conversation with your boss or your arch enemy partner will turn out, there will be pizza. You earned it, and there will be awesome company to be happy about.
Let alone the thought that it will be done and over with! YAY!
Now as weird as it sounds, I find that shifting my focus, readjusting my awareness not on the issue at hand but on a "sweet sidestory" of that day that I plan purposefully, I can hype myself about the day ahead even if the challenge seems monumentally taxing on the psychological level. Where there was only fear and worry, there now is anticipation and eagerness to just get done with that "chore" in order to go do something I love. To move in the right direction, and to reward myself for it.
I find the more I cycle this new focus in my mind the more relaxed I become, the more able I feel to face the challenge at hand that - not long ago - had occupied the vast majority of my conscious thinking process.
These examples may not work for you because you may not have a boss or a sour relationship, nor may pizza be something out of the ordinary for ya, these just illustrate the point of "Focus Magic". It enables us to face our challenges and diffuses nearly all obsessive energy spent on something that we ultimately would want to overcome if only we could find the nerve to do so.
To then go do what we really would like to do knowing we are one giant step farther than the day before...
# 2: Handling Adversity & Multiplying Prosperity
# 3: "Mileage Over Results"
# 4: "Your Ego is not your Enemy"
# 5: The Rubber Band Analogy
# 6: Lack of Production = Source of Depression
# 7: "If you HAVE to pick a belief, might as well pick one that's useful..."
# 8: Substituting Scarcity-Thoughts & Replacing Self-Worth-Denial
# 9: Trust That Things Will Change Again
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