I have been reflecting on the paradox that is ’social media’ and how much humans seek validation from it. It is actually scary how overwhelmingly people are drawn to fame, how far people will go to get that validation from a billion strangers. I can't exclude myself from these people because I can remember instances when I have been caught in the web of trying to impress strangers whose attention span is quite low.
One of my mutuals on Twitter once said that you can always do whatever you set out to do, because no one is looking at you. And even if they are, it is just for a few minutes. They might have their comments or thoughts but within the next few minutes, their attention is already flitting to something else. There is this certain thrill or for better word_pleasure of validation that can be gotten from having strangers fawn over you and whatever you have to offer to them. But most of the time, that thrill lasts for a short period of time. It's like an high. Then, you are seeking for the next thrill and even if it means doing some quite embarrassing things to get it, it will be done.
Well, that's by the way. I did some sort of observation on some of my friends. There's one of them I admire so much. She does her things quietly, gets her wins quietly and celebrates them quietly. I have never seen her try to be loud about whatever she got or has succeeded in doing. She wasn't concerned about seeking validation from social media. Let's say she got a high paying job or got promoted at work for instance, her next thought or action wasn't to tell millions of strangers about it, just so she could hear their praises or their ’congratulations’. Sometimes, wanting to hear from other people that you have done well for yourself can be quite nice. But I never saw her having a need for that. It left me wondering how she felt accomplished whenever she did something great. I never got to asking her about it but I think I sort of cracked the code.
There are people who are quite confident in their abilities, be it artistic or intellectual. They only validation they need is from themselves. And even if they share their wins with people, they share it with those who matter. They share it with people who already recognize their abilities than sharing it with millions of people who are just strangers to them. It's not like they don't seek that thrill of having people recognize and praise them for what they do or have done but if they tell the three or four people who actually care about them about their accomplishments, it is enough. It takes only hearing words of encouragement from this special people for them to move on. They get sufficient validation from that special person or thing.
A person I admire, Mr Green, succinctly put it like this, “Validation is another form of currency. The absence of external recognition doesn't mean someone isn't seeking validation. It just means they have found it in places the world isn't privy to.” And somehow, that's food for thought for me.
Thanks for reading.✨
comic credits:sarahandersen