It starts with a surprisingly simple (hint: financial) concept
So, you married your "money-opposite." Join the club! One thing is certain - getting aligned in your financial life will bring riches to your married life.
Everyone seems to know that money is the number one reason for divorce in the first five years of marriage. However, if blaming a relationship breakdown on something made out of paper seems odd to you, it’s because money isn’t the real issue - it’s generally something else.
When it's easier to just blame money
A root cause is the true underlying source of a problem. Perhaps in a challenged marriage relationship, the root cause is a ‘need for control’ or ‘a need for power’ or ‘a feeling of guilt’ that is causing the conflict. It’s just a lot easier to blame money, which is why this is the response of choice when broken couples are asked for the reason.
Successful marriages are all about give and take, respect and appreciating different perspectives. Two heads are always better than one when they are working well together. So if you think that making a big money decision is best made solo, beware - listening to another perspective from someone who is aligned with your financial future (and with a vested interest in it!) is always a good thing.
Don't do it alone
The biggest financial mistakes I have personally made, were made without my wife’s involvement. I no longer make big financial decisions without her because she brings a different perspective from mine to the table - she will ask questions I won't. She sees the world from a different angle and she will challenge me - together we simply make better decisions than we do separately. The same could probably be said when it comes to parenting, career planning, retirement and most other big decisions in life.
So what matters is not whether you have two chequing accounts or one chequing account. What matters is that you are communicating openly, discussing pros and cons, actively participating in the journey and learning from each decision made together.
With one life to live, we can all learn a lot from our life mate. Don’t forget the reasons you’re together - to make each other better.