An alarm. A fucking alarm.
So, tonight I had an office conference call scheduled at 9 PM.
I, being the lazy ass that I am, decided to ask Siri, my loyal and most faithful companion since past three years, to set the alarm for me.
It was a quarter to 7 in the evening, when I approached Siri for help.
Me: “Hey Siri!”
Siri: “Hey there, Jeffy!”
Me: “Siri, please set an alarm for 9 PM.”
Siri: “Set the alarm for when?”
Me: “9 PM.”
Siri: “I didn’t find any appointments for today at 9 PM. Shall I create one?”
Me: “No. Just set an alarm for 9 PM.”
Siri: “Set an alarm for when?”
Me: “Set an alarm for 9 PM tonight, Siri.”
Siri: “Opium is a dried latex obtained from the…”
Me (absolutely flabbergasted): “Set a fucking alarm for 9 PM.”
Siri: “Your fucking alarm has been set at 9 PM.”
Me: “Thank you, dear lord!”
Closes Siri.
Contempt with Siri’s behaviour, I decided to visit my best friend’s place to hangout. Unfortunately, her dad was in a pretty bad mood and I, being a moron that I am, decided to cheer him up in a lame manner.
Me: “Uncle, it’s getting pretty chilly here, right? Let’s have a beer?”
Uncle: “Hmmm. Is the temperature cold enough to cool my mind?”
Me (In excitement): “Yes, actually we can take a look at the temperature, must be around 15–16, I guess…”
Quickly unlocks my phone and swipes to the right.
Uncle’s eyes quickly zoom up towards the top corner.
Uncle: “What is this? An alarm? For what?”
Me (muttering softly): “Fuck you, Siri.”
Well played, Siri. Well played.